To the Daily Mail
The poor girls who were upset at the use of the phrase “bastard trenches” on BBC Breakfast should steer clear of ironmongers and plumbing supplies shops.
These places will sell them stop cocks, drain cocks (heavy duty), ball cocks, short screws, long screws, bastard screws, bastard files, bent male-to-female connectors, u-bends, maleto-female unions, male-to-male unions, male nipples, male-tofemale nipples, female elbows, male-to-female elbows, twoinch male-to-male bends and, of course, nuts. But if they’re feeling a little soiled after that, they can also buy washers.
William Neil, Reading, Berkshire
To The Daily Telegraph
“Bastard” is a perfectly respectable word. As a term of abuse, it was gloriously misinterpreted when General Templer berated a battalion of mutinous Chinese troops during the Malayan Emergency.
Templer: “You’re a lot of…
