Pick Me Up! 20-Oct-2016

What A Devil! Are you clever? Do you have pale skin, hazel eyes and reddish pubic hair?! If so, you may be descended from Lucifer... Go to www.lifedeathprizes.com/fallen-angel 600 A 600-year-old joke: A bishop was worried his teeth were so loose they’d fall out. ‘They won’t,’ said a friend. ‘How can you tell?’ asked the bishop. His pal replied, ‘My testicles have been hanging loose for the last 40 years, and they haven’t fallen off yet!’ What A Downer! My friend downing his beer on a trip to a Bavarian-style beerhouse recently. Glug, glug, glug! What A Way To Lose Weight! Forget snacking on treats at the cinema – bring this special box of popcorn with you instead! You’ll never be peckish when you’ve got cuddles.…

Double trouble Dorothy had Toto. Turner had Hooch. And my daughter Morgan, 5, has Daisy the cockapoo. They’re the best of friends, and partners in crime! Stacy Gibson, Hartlebury, Worcestershire Middleton moment I had a very special time with the glam Duchess Of Cambridge when she came to Truro not long ago. But it’s probably just as well she didn’t notice... Tracey Pascoe, Illogan, Cornwall Ooh, la la! Since it opened in 1889, 250million people have climbed the 1,050 feet to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris. Me, my mum Tara and my aunt Hero Betty Lall are just three of them. Alisha Khan, West London Little STAR You wouldn’t want to mess with my niece Brooke, 5. Strength, determination…she could show a few adults a thing or…

‘I didn’t know Derrick well, but he was friendly’ Growing up, I knew all the neighbours in our sleepy cul-de-sac. A close-knit community, we’d call into each other’s houses regularly. Derrick Evans lived five doors down with his wife. I’d greet them on Sundays at church with my mum Krys, then 41, dad Keith, 53, and my younger brother Paul. Then, when I was 13, I was hit by a serious mystery virus. I’d sores all over my stomach, zero energy. Hospitalised for several weeks, eventually, I was discharged. Still weak, I couldn’t walk to school like usual. Derrick, then 56, worked in a hardware store near school and offered to give me a lift. ‘How kind,’ Mum thanked him. I didn’t know Derrick well, but he was a friendly…

‘It’s a condition often known as painful fat syndrome’ I know what you’re thinking... Look at the size of her legs! I’ve heard it all before. See, ever since I was a kid, my legs have been on the chunky side. My mum Jayne, now 53, just thought that’s the way I was built. Then, when I was 12, I started going through puberty. I started my periods, my body began to change... And my legs started growing even bigger! ‘My jeans don’t fit,’ I’d huff to Mum. ‘They do look a bit tight,’ she’d agree, seeing me struggle to squeeze my thighs into a pair. My legs seemed too big for my body. I envied my mates with their slim pins. ‘I hate my legs,’ I’d tell them. Mine…

Cougar Concerns Evelyn, 52, Dublin My 25-year-old son recently told my husband and me that he’d met someone. Never one to settle down, he’s spent the past few years jumping from girlfriend to girlfriend, so we were overjoyed to hear his news. Telling us about her, he mentioned that his new lady was a bit older than him and had a young daughter. Not thinking much of it, we assumed she was in her late 20s or early 30s. We had no idea until we met her that she was actually 47... Her daughter is 23, so this lady is dating someone young enough to be her own child! I’m troubled by this relationship, but am worried about pushing my son away. Should I voice my concerns? YES Pick Me…

‘Dylan’s eyes rolled back and he started to spasm – a fit’ ‘We still don’t have a name for what’s wrong with him’ My newborn baby in my arms, I couldn’t take my eyes off him. I scanned from his long eyelashes to his tiny fingers then his toes and back again. ‘He’s perfect,’ I said to my husband Richard, 41. Such a relief! See, when I was carrying Dylan, a scan at 20 weeks revealed that his organs were reversed. The doctor explained it was rare but not unheard of, and in many people it caused no symptoms at all. Still, it was hard not to worry. Especially as another scan at 27 weeks showed Dylan was still very small for this point in the pregnancy. ‘It’s likely…