Innholdsfortegnelse for December 2018 i FourFourTwo UK

Even for FFT, flying to Los Angeles to interview Zlatan Ibrahimovic was a pretty big deal. For staff writer Chris Flanagan, this epic encounter came a few days after a draining 18-hour round trip to the Scottish Highlands to watch Britain’s worst team, Fort William. So it probably makes sense for him to tell you about this month’s issue and his week of two halves… Chris, what was it like coming face to face with Zlatan? Entertaining. He was unleashing classic Zlatanisms even before the interview began, and his eyes lit up when I said I was from near Manchester. “Red or blue?” he asked, ready to make a quip. He was disappointed when I said Bolton. How did LA and Fort William compare? I went straight to the airport…

CLUBS 1998-99 Notts County 1999-2005 Arsenal 2002-03 Watford (loan) 2003-04 Leeds United (loan) 2005-06 Birmingham City 2006-09 Liverpool 2009 Portsmouth (loan) 2009-10 Real Zaragoza 2010-14 Stoke City 2012-13 Wolves (loan) 2014 Pune City 2015 Wigan Athletic 2016 Tampines Rovers 2017 Bury 2017 Billericay Town “I FELT THE VODKA BOUNCING AROUND IN MY STOMACH AND YOU COULD SMELL IT ON MY BREATH... I DID OK TO SCORE A HAT-TRICK” WHAT’S LIFE LIKE FOR A FOOTBALLER IN PRISON? HOW CLOSE WAS HE TO JOINING REAL MADRID? AND, COME ON: IS HE REALLY A PORNSTAR? “I have had a good career – I’m not unhappy – but I could’ve done more, I know that. I could have made more of myself and my ability.” This is what Jermaine Pennant allows himself to think…

Dortmund v Bayern November 10 With BVB flying out of the traps and Niko Kovac enduring early wobbles, Bayern face a tough trip Man City vs Man Utd November 11 Can United shock their rivals at the Etihad again, after coming back from 2-0 down to win in April? England vs Croatia November 18 Croatia. At home. In the last game of the group. Gareth, you’d be wise to leave the brolly at home Germany vs Netherlands November 19 Die Mannschaft could be relegated in the Nations League. What’s the German for Schadenfreude? PSG vs Liverpool November 28 Neymar, Mbappe, Cavani, Choupo-Moting – it will be a tough test in France for Klopp and his men Sheffield United vs Leeds December 1 A Yorkshire derby; when Marcelo Bielsa was coach…

Building The Yellow Wall Uli Hesse (Weidenfeld & Nicolson, £20) Hesse’s latest tome on German football charts the journey of Borussia Dortmund, a rollercoaster ride featuring dalliances with bankruptcy and a Champions League triumph in 1997, which came 31 years after the club had won West Germany’s first European trophy. The reasons for BVB’s unique popularity are expertly teased out, including the titular Yellow Wall, a phrase coined as recently as 2005 to describe the Schwarzgelben fans on a 24,000-capacity South Stand terrace, itself a throwback to a bygone age. The club consciously set out to be the polar opposite of corporate behemoths Bayern Munich and employ several supporter liaison officers; the resulting rapport has helped to create the choreography and chanting that gives Dortmund one of the most spine-tingling…

“WINNING THE LEAGUE WITH NOTTS COUNTY AS EARLY AS MARCH HELPED TO ESTABLISH ME AS A MANAGER” Notts County 1 L Orient 0 March 28, 1998 Division Three “Winning the league so early helped to establish me as a manager – I think it’s the quickest anyone’s won it since the war. Mark Robson scored the winner. Although we had record-breaking runs, it was probably the only time Meadow Lane was packed to the rafters.” Bolton 3 Preston 0 May 28, 2001 First Division play-off final “I started my playing career at Bolton as a 15-year-old, so becoming manager, getting to the play-offs and beating Preston in Cardiff was special. We didn’t think we’d do it that season because we had sold some of our best players in Eidur Gudjohnsen,…

When Ynysddu Welfare were drawn away to Briton Ferry in the first round of the Welsh Youth Cup, eyebrows were raised, not least at the club itself. “We don’t have a youth team – God knows how that happened!” tweeted a confused Welfare. Manager/secretary Ben Murphy tells FFT: “That tweet got lots of interest. I thought, ‘Let’s have a go’.” As a team was hurriedly scrabbled together, including some who Murphy says “hadn’t played for two years”, he secretly feared humiliation. “Briton are a good standard,” he explains. “They had six boys who were in Swansea’s academy two years ago. I think they had four chances in the first five minutes...” His ragtag XI soon went behind but they settled, equalised, scored in extra time, tired badly, conceded again, then…

@RichardOsman Theresa May getting tough reminds me so much of Kevin Keegan getting tough. @MylesBurrell My word. A kid has just taken a penalty at half-time, missed, been asked to retake it, and Gunnersaurus has saved the retake. Unreal scenes. What a club. @archiert1 My hero of the weekend – this Fortuna Dusseldorf fan. Carrying at least seven beers *and* a bratwurst. #ImpossibleIsNothing @jimdalycomedy At Dulwich v Palace and the most non-league thing has just happened. The guy over the tannoy read out the registration of a car that was being towed. The Dulwich keeper suddenly started frantically calling to someone in the crowd. It’s his car. @kylewalker2 UEFA Nations is coming home.…

It’s you or them. You’re crouched, tracking the enemy through the bush. It’s dusk. You’re surrounded by acacia trees, the low sun is streaming through the long grass – and then you see them. A pair of eyes staring right into yours. You have to act first. To survive, you have to act first. It’s you or them. You’re a young footballer, arriving from a faraway country. Your new place of work is with the multiple European Cup winners, and you’re among some of the best players in the world. There’s a hierarchy. Senior pros want to test a newcomer’s mettle. You have to act first. To survive, you have to act first. I came to Liverpool FC in March 1981. Just weeks later, the club beat Real Madrid in…

A Killer haircut And moustache, for that matter. Brian Kilcline remains a Toon icon. “Fetch the sugar paper” No photos for this European Fairs Cup effort, just colour. Lots of it. Battle of the bridges It’s the Tyne Bridge vs the Tees Transporter Bridge – who wins? “Watch your left hand, Les” Rob Lee gets a bit more than he bargained for from Mr Ferdinand... Getting cosy A sterling attempt at beating the world record for people in a room. Circling the drain What happens when you just can’t decide on a cover image? Pick five. From a distance No players, the manager or even block colours. Simply the ground. Kitson’s new wheels Ever spotted ‘fabulous’ and ‘Rover’ in the same sentence? Us neither. Red is the colour Surely a…

KNIGHTS OUT Medieval warriors first came up with the idea of sliding a greave between shin bones and outer armour, often decorating them with Gorgon’s heads for good luck. Made from leather, cloth or iron, they covered the front and back of the legs. HOWZAT?! Ever at the zeitgeist, cricketers realised it hurt if you got hit by a hard ball, so strapped on pads to protect their pins. The bigger the pads, it soon became clear, the harder it was to be bowled out, until lawmakers brought in rule change ‘leg before wicket’. BIG SAMMY STYLE Tired of his shins being hacked to pieces in 1874, Nottingham Forest’s Sam Weller Widdowson – a one-time Nottinghamshire batsman – decided to cut down a pair of his cricket pads before tying…

“During the match between Notts and Bolton on Thursday, Mr Alexander Brodie was allowed to try his patent netting arrangement, with the object of saving disputes regarding whether the ball had passed through the required goal space. Netting extended back from the posts at a slight angle for about one and a half yards, while another net was fastened to the bar and drawn backwards like a roof. The plan is simple and effective, but the nets should be used on grounds with lots of room behind the goal, whereas there is little at Bolton. The Wanderers had a free-kick and, tipping the ball to Jones, the full-back shot through, Brown unable to stop the high shot. Barbour scored a second and the Wanderers had much the better of the…

JORDAN X PSG COLLECTION store.nike.com The Michael Jordan wing of Nike have teamed up with PSG to release the hottest football-fashion crossover of recent years, presumably after they’d decided that the Jordan logo’s resemblance to the Eiffel Tower on the club’s crest was too good an opportunity to ignore. Hype beasts worldwide will love the range’s sleek Parisian design, while PSG’s Neymar is one step closer to his dream of playing a non-contact sport such as darts. Next month, Nike reveal their ambitious Jay Spearing/ Blackpool Tower project. NIKE MERCURIAL VAPOR PE ‘MODRIC’ BOOTS N/A Claiming a third consecutive Champions League title and leading Croatia to their first World Cup final won Luka Modric the UEFA 2018 Best Player award. To honour the diminutive Real Madrid playmaker, Nike released a…

Gavin McBain The artist illustrated this month’s Between The Lines with Bruce Grobbelaar. “It was fun to illustrate a character like Bruce, who I’m old enough to have seen play. I even included a few homages to my favourite Vietnam war movies.” Jon Shard The ace lensman snapped Ibra for our cover. “Zlatan was a dream to work with - he had the presence of a friendly giant. We had a good old natter, comparing the weather in LA with Manchester. He certainly isn’t missing the rain back in England, that’s for sure!” Hunter Godson The youngest (and therefore ‘hippest’) member of the FFT team oversaw the first outing of our shiny new gear section, The Mixer. “It may have taken a few thousand emails to pull this section together,…

HIGH: 1999 Joins Arsenal for record £2m fee a week before his 16th birthday LOW: 2000-2002 Suffers from homesickness and frustration at lack of playing time HIGH: 2003 Scores a hat-trick in his first Premier League start for Arsenal LOW: 2005 Imprisoned and then given ankle tag after drink-driving charge HIGH: 2007 Plays 90 minutes of Liverpool’s Champions League Final in Athens LOW: 2010 Leaves Real Zaragoza following repeated disciplinary action HIGH: 2011 Impresses at Stoke and starts in the club’s historic FA Cup Final…

“I HAVE A STRANGE PHOBIA OF FEET. AS A KID, I’D WEAR SOCKS JUST TO HIDE THEM” Hi Alex. You won Bear Grylls’ show, Mission Survive . Does Bear drink his own urine as frequently off-camera as he does on it? Hi. Yeah, he doesn’t seem to care about stuff like that. It’s so blasé and natural, just part of his day-to-day life. He thinks we’re the weird ones for questioning it. That was a great experience, though. I had never even been camping before, let alone trying to survive in the wild. Do you now feel well-prepared for the impending apocalypse? Oh no, absolutely not at all. I suppose I have discovered that I’ve got the ability to get into survival mode. It’s all instinct. But…

DR ADAMS A doctor of defence He is simply outstanding: Mr Arsenal PIZZA-FACE Pizza all over me Worst thing I’ve seen in this sport They got off scot-free MYOPIA Sometimes I see it But I say that I didn’t To protect my team DENNIS BERGKAMP Immaculate touch The peerless perfectionist A beautiful mind SOL CAMPBELL He came from the Lane Such a power spread from him A rock at the back CAVIAR AND SAUSAGES If you eat caviar Every day, it’s hard to Return to sausages Arsene Wenger has earned several nicknames: Le Professeur, Inspector Clouseau – that was Ray Parlour’s – and plenty from rival fans that we’ll steer well clear of here. ‘Le Prof’ has stuck, though, and now pearls of the former Arsenal gaffer’s intellect have been…

“MIKEL ARTETA’S ADVICE WAS SO GOOD FOR ME - HE WILL BE AN AWESOME COACH” How are things going at Nagoya Grampus? Much better now. [Smiles] It wasn’t easy at first: we lost some games in a row and I had never gone through that before. But after the World Cup, some experienced players arrived and helped me to get 12 goals in seven games, including two hat-tricks. What differences have you noticed in Japan? Fans in Brazil and even Europe are more emotional and sometimes cross limits. The Japanese are very different: when we lose, they aren’t happy, but they won’t whistle you or insult you in front of your wife. I can take her anywhere and not worry about someone coming after me. What is it like to…

MONEY MONEY MONEY The gulf in the top flight is too big – nearly every Manchester City player is worth more individually than Cardiff’s whole side. Tim Banks ALEXIS NOT ON FIRE The decision to hold Copas America in both 2015 and 2016 has hit Alexis Sanchez’s career – he looks burnt out. Steven Blake GIVE ALEX A CHANCE How can people talk about sacking Alex McLeish as Scotland boss? He’s only been in charge for nine months. Ronnie Stewart GIBRALTAR ROCKED Winning back-to-back Nations League games was an amazing feat for Gibraltar; it’d be great to see them at Euro 2020. Sian Towell BENZ OUT OF SHAPE Why didn’t Real Madrid sign a top striker when Cristiano Ronaldo left? Karim Benzema’s goal record isn’t good enough. Pablo Lopez LAST…

DID ANYONE SEE WHO SCORED? Commentators should keep their cool in big moments, but it’s more endearing when they don’t. When Dennis Bergkamp scored his brilliant winner against Argentina at France 98, all Dutchman Jack van Gelder could do was scream ‘DENNIS BERGKAMP’ eight times, sum up the goal briefly, and scream ‘DENNIS BERGKAMP’ again. VICTOR HUGO’S LESS MISERABLE The reaction to Diego Maradona’s display against England at the 1986 World Cup was always going to depend on your stance. After El Diez’s solo-supergoal, England heard Barry Davies stoically admitting, “You have to say that’s magnificent.” Argentine radio had something more lyrical. “Cosmic kite! What planet are you from, to leave in your wake so many Englishmen?” wailed Victor Hugo Morales. “Thank you, God, for soccer, for Maradona, for these…

It doesn’t take a genius to work out why Cox’s would ask Arsenal skipper Tony Adams to promote the start of English apple season in September 1998. However, Tone wasn’t always so happy to see the fruit bowl regular. “The other night one of our players ate an apple, but I let it go,” he said in 2003 while boss of Wycombe. “If I started talking about what it does to the digestive system before you play football, I’d confuse the hell out of them.” Or bore them.…

1 “HELLO, IS THIS ED WOODWARD?” England London He’s one of history’s greatest footballers and won the Champions League three times in two and a half years as a coach – but Zinedine Zidane showed on a trip to London that he loves a tourist cliché. While speculation was rife about Jose Mourinho’s Manchester United future, an unemployed Zizou entered a classic red phone box and pretended to make a call, to the delight of football’s gossip columnists. The Frenchman did ignore their requests for him to lurk ominously behind Jose Mourinho’s waxwork at Madame Tussaud’s, however. Spoilsport. 2 THE VEINS IN SPAIN... Spain Zamora Say what you like about lower-league Spanish side Zamora, but they always show heart. That’s because Los Viriatos have unveiled a new Kappa kit showing…

Answers 1) Sergio Aguero; 2) Ryan Giggs; 3) James McClean; 4) Martin Keown & Ruud van Nistelrooy; 5) Robbie Fowler; 6) Cyrille Regis; 7) Ossie Ardiles; 8) Roger Milla; 9) Cristiano Ronaldo; 10) Teddy Sheringham & Paul Gascoigne; 11) Nikola Zigic & Obafemi Martins; 12) Tony Yeboah; 13) Lionel Messi; 14) Thierry Henry; 15) Eric Cantona; 16) Emre Can; 17) Harry Kane; 18) Brian Deane; 19) Jermaine Beckford; 20) Jurgen Klinsman To see more of Paul Rider’s creations, follow @subbuteolegends on Twitter ePROTEST In Switzerland, Young Boys fans hurled PS4 controllers on to the pitch to protest the rise of gaming - they also held aloft a banner saying ‘Shit eSports’. Indeed.…

Accrington Stanley’s 2018 has been jaw-dropping, with promotion from League Two quickly followed by a great start to life in the third tier. And one Accy fan still needs to pick their jaw off the floor, because a set of false teeth have been found at the Wham Stadium. When mysterious gnashers were found under a seat after Stanley’s win over AFC Wimbledon, the club shared the news on social media. “We put out an appeal for the teeth to be returned to their owner, and we were surprised by the attention it got,” a club spokesperson tells FFT. “We got all the jokes: Stanley having bite, not being toothless... if you’ll pardon the pun, we were sick to the back teeth of it in the end.” But before the…

THE STORY SO FAR: Another young De Jong at Ajax, Frenkie was at the Willem II academy for over 10 years before making his Eredivisie debut in 2015 and joining Ajax a few months later. The stylish midfielder was an Ajax regular in 2017-18, acting as a ball-playing centre-back next to fellow hotshot Matthijs de Ligt; now he’s thriving further forward, having moved to accommodate a returning Daley Blind. De Jong also started in the Dutch midfield in a 3-0 win over Germany, superb balance allowing him to control the ball on the half-turn and seek a forward pass. THEY SAID: “He’s a beastly talent,” is Xavi’s take. “He looks like Sergio Busquets in his playing style. He’s exactly what Barça need: technically very strong, hard-working and with a lot…

Record breaker Hits 44 goals in just 77 games for CSKA Moscow to earn a 2008 move to Manchester City, aged 21; the £19m fee is a club record until Robinho arrives a month later. Annus mirabilis Scores all five of his career goals for Brazil in 2013 as they lift the Confederations Cup, and thrives alongside Ronaldinho as Atletico Mineiro win the Copa Libertadores. The best in Brazil Wins the Brazilian league’s Player of the Year award as top scorer while Corinthians win the 2017 title, helped by his goal-getting return to his boyhood club.…

fourfourtwo@futurenet.com FourFourTwoUK FourFourTwo ✱ STAR LETTER FABINHO CAN STAR Your big feature about Liverpool’s redemption under Klopp [FFT 292] helped me to answer a question I have been pondering: why has Fabinho [above right] found it hard to get into the starting XI? Reading the interview with Andy Robertson, it’s clear that initial patience can pay dividends, even if game time seems a long way away at first. Fabinho will have an important role to play and may even help the Reds to win their first trophy since 2012. Joe Scargill, Wakefield POGBA IS EMBARRASSING The superb article about Paul Pogba in FFT 293 was insightful and portrays the World Cup-winning midfielder as someone who clearly enjoys his life as a footballer – but that should not excuse his recent…

Have you always made a point of shouting ‘goooooal’ for as long as is humanly possible? Until 1990, it was impossible to do it, because we were under communist rule and it wasn’t good to be seen as the expressive type. After 1990 I could really be myself on air; I could put all my passion into what I was doing. In 1992, I commentated on a cup game at a third-tier club. The hosts scored and I screamed ‘goal’ for more than 20 seconds without taking a breath. It was a world record, but I didn’t realise it at the time. When did you first knowingly break the world record? The first time I officially set the record was in 2011 at a Europa League qualifying game between a…

This time 15 years ago, Adriano Leite Ribeiro was on top of the world. This was a footballer with the exact same awe-inspiring combination of blistering pace, startling power, nimble footwork and Pro Evo-approved thunderous shooting as the original Ronaldo, and he was getting a lot of people very excited. His form with Parma in the early stages of the 2003-04 season – eight goals in nine Serie A matches – was enough to earn a big-money move to Inter, where he seemed destined to become one of the biggest stars in the game. It was all but inevitable. Yet, despite the Nerazzurri winning four Serie A titles during Adriano’s stay there, his is another ‘what if?’ story. After years of living a lifestyle perhaps not suited to an elite…

Johnny Haynes is hailed by many as the most creative midfielder England has ever had. Between 1954 and 1962 he won 56 caps (22 as the captain) and scored 18 goals, but is best known nowadays for becoming the first British footballer to earn £100 a week in 1961. Shortly before Haynes died in October 2005, following a car crash on his 71st birthday, he was asked to collaborate on an autobiography. His reply? “Don’t think so. Nobody knows who I am.” That isn’t entirely true. Haynes is still revered at his beloved Fulham, but his legend should extend far beyond west London’s leafy diaspora. This is a player who left Bobby Charlton in awe. “I could only admire his ability to read a game,” the World Cup and Ballon…

Colin Barrett Who? Former Manchester City and Nottingham Forest full-back who Brian Clough signed for £29,000 in 1976. Barrett won the First Division in ’78 before a knee injury all-but ended his career. He missed the following year’s European Cup win over Malmo, and played only 12 more competitive matches. That’s unlucky It got worse, too. He struggled to find work after retirement and was forced onto the dole. He later pulled pints behind the bar at The Crown Hotel in Southwell before another career move. What’s better than pulling pints? Well, Colin built and sold snooker tables in the mid-80s, until the baize dropped out of the industry. Then, after “hating” selling lottery tickets for Forest’s commercial team, he did up the outside of his house. “A neighbour said,…

1 GIUSEPPE BERGOMI UNCLE “What? Are you really 18?” said Inter midfielder Gianpiero Marini to his mustachioed team-mate in the teenage defender’s first training session. “You look like my old uncle.” Zio’s elderly epithet was born. 2 HANS-GEORG SCHWARZENBECK THE BODYGUARD Franz Beckenbauer’s defensive partner for club and country was labelled ‘Katsche’ as the guy who did Der Kaiser’s donkey work. Big Keeley Hawes fan, too... 3 BILLY McNEILL CESAR Many people believe that Celtic’s 1967 European Cup-winning captain earned the moniker for his immense leadership qualities. In fact, the Bhoys’ team modelled themselves on the Rat Pack in Ocean’s Eleven, and like Cesar Romero’s character in the movie – Duke Santos – Billy was the only player who had his own car. 4 RONALD KOEMAN LITTLE SNOWFLAKE The Barcelona…

Dynamo The story of how 11 Dynamo Kiev players beat a Luftwaffe XI in 1942, only to be executed is mired in myth. Andy Dougan looks for the truth in this moving tale. 1963 Santos home strip True, Real Madrid have the all-white look nailed down, but Santos were no less stylish during the early-60s. After all, Pele looks good in anything, right? Gola boots The Goalmasters bestrode British bootmaking in the ’70s. Not the most comfortable, but they won pure style points and became synonymous with England’s players.…

GARETH BALE “If I was to go for a natural left-back I’d pick Eric Abidal or Wayne Bridge, but I think it looks sexy having Bale there! When he first went to Spurs at left-back, they had that run where they never won when he started, but that was purely coincidence. When I joined, he was transforming into a left-winger and benefiting from playing with Luka Modric and other good players in that Tottenham team. His speed and ability to go past people was incredible.” ANDRES INIESTA “It’s virtually impossible to choose Iniesta without Xavi, but I’ve got to split them up. Xavi controlled play and played around the opposition, but as an individual I just thought Iniesta was even better: he had more of a change of pace. He’s…