Innholdsfortegnelse for January 2019 i FHM Australia (Archive)

My favourite colour is purple. I like it more than blue and red combined. My girlfriend told me she was leaving me because I keep pretending to be a Transformer. I said, “No, wait! I can change.” I asked my girlfriend if she’d like a day of eating ice cream and hanging with her girlfriends. She said, “Ooh, yes.” I said, “Good, because I’m breaking up with you.” I used to be a narcissist. But now look at me. They say makeup sex is the best… Which is lucky, because all my sex is made up. I’ve been dating a homeless woman recently, and I think it’s starting to get serious… She’s asked me to move out with her. I bought a dog off a blacksmith today. As soon as…

DJ BBQ SAYS… “It came to me in a dream: the recipe for the most radonkulous burger any mortal has ever tasted. Platters of chicken wings, t-bone steaks and pico de gallo salsa were flashing through my mind when, all of a sudden, the ultimate goliath burger shone down on me from the clouds, and floated onto my dinner plate. The beast had a halo, for Christ’s sake. What I saw made my stomach high-five itself: a cheesy double patty, topped with mushrooms, shredded lettuce and, most importantly, a burger sauce so secret that I think the Gods of Rad may kick my butt for telling y’all. But screw it – here it is, in all its heavenly glory. Enjoy, and don’t forget to Instagram it using #FHMManFood so I…

In 1995 Air Combat was released on the original PlayStation. It combined realistic graphics with arcade-style aerial dogfights never before seen on a console, it was a game changer for all plane fanatics. Fast forward to 2019 and the seventh iteration of the Combat series makes it a highly anticipated current-gen debut and it’s without a doubt the best in the series. Placing you in the cockpit of the most advanced warplanes, Ace Combat 7 delivers white-knuckle dogfighting action with incredible graphics, all wrapped around a surprisingly good storyline. With a brand-new graphics engine, the beautifully rendered cloud-filled skies and incredibly detailed cityscapes have never looked better and the level of detail creates a sense of realism never seen before in the series. The combat itself is flying perfection, with…

When you think of BMW, you automatically think 3 Series. Even though BMW has grown into several new markets, it is the 3 Series which continues to define the brand’s mix of driving excitement and the one we gravitate towards. Although it is no longer priced as the entry point to the brand, many still aspire to the 3 Series as the gateway to premium motoring. The 3 Series is all-new. The amount of detail and technology that has been poured into the 7th generation is more than any 3 Series we can remember. So if we feel this model’s crucial role in the brand, BMW has risen to meet our expectations. Mind you, it is still recognisable as an evolution of the 3 Series, just a little longer than…

From a young age I was determined to fill my life with music. I moved to London and eventually made my way onto the BBC. My memory is a kaleidoscope of incredible images. I remember touring the US with Queen, and being mobbed by baying fans with Marc Bolan [of T. Rex]. It was a real trip. I was swept into a crazy rock and roll vortex. The parties were endless – full of global stars and Hollywood freaks. There was hedonism at every turn. That lifestyle doesn’t necessarily make anyone happy. It catches up with you. I stopped spending time at home, and that led to the end of my marriage. Before long, we realised that our drinking partners were dropping off one by one. Jim Morrison, Janis Joplin…

01 INTERIOR DESIGN The three-spoke sports steering wheel comes in leather and the steering wheel bezel in anthracite and grey top-stitching. 02 CLEAR STEERING Includes a direct-steer system with speed-sensitive steering power assistance and variable steering ratio. 03 LISTEN UP AUX/USB, Bluetooth with hands-free, audio streaming for music transfer and smart-cross connect app for iOS and Android. 04 KITTED OUT The Sports package and the Cool & Audio package are already on board the Smart car fortwo as standard features. Like the plot of some ’80s breakdance movie, the Smart car gang are gearing up to take back the city that’s rightfully theirs. When it arrived first in 1998, the world didn’t know what to make of the titchy little half-a-car that could park facing the kerb and easily get…

You and your girlfriend have just made it official. You’ve wined her. You’ve dined her. You’ve tried out all your best bedroom moves and… she’s liked them. You’ve even met her dad, and managed to charm your way through lunch without swearing like a pissed-up pirate, talking about his daughter’s ‘sexy butt’ or being chased out of his house at gunpoint. Feels like all the hard work’s done, right? Nuh huh. There’s one more giant hurdle left to overcome. A few of them, actually. They’re the Simon Cowells of your relationship, the people who – with just a thumbs up or thumbs down – will dictate whether you have a joyous, sex-filled future ahead with your new girlfriend, or if you’re dying a sad, lonely hermit. The BFF Test is…

FESTIVAL FAVE Marley Get Together Look good? Emily says: “A retro-style speaker that harks back to mid-20th century style. A good option if you don’t want anything too modern.” Can I take it to the beach? Yep, the rechargeable battery means you can take it anywhere. The wooden construction also makes it an option if you lose your beach tennis racket. Sound good? The wood casing and twin woofers mean this model delivers a serious amount of bass, even with the sound turned up loud. Our verdict: Great product that works at home and in the middle of a field. We like. 7/10 HEAVY HITTER Harman Kardon Aura, Look good? Emily says: “A lot of thought has gone into the appearance of this speaker, but it resembles a vacuum cleaner.…

Infusing Porsche DNA in a family SUV is a relationship and challenge the sportscar maker has enjoyed and obviously been very good at. In our opinion they’ve never slipped behind the competition as they remain the benchmark in build quality and driving fun but currently Porsche is on a big overhaul of all its products. The next wave has reached shores. The Macan’s visual upgrade isn’t as pronounced as the Cayenne’s dramatic reprofiling yet Macan is truer to those Porsche dimensions out the box so it requires less fettling. If you don’t immediately spot the new headlights or subtle edging to the bumpers, the new 2019 Macan gets Porsche’s new lightbar which runs end to end along the boot. When Macan arrives in South Africa later this year (start ordering…

We hear you are a big gamer can you tell us more about that? I’ll play just about any game I can get my hands on, top titles for me currently are Clash Royale still, Red Dead and I still need to kick ass daily in Doom. What are you looking forward to in the coming year? My year looks super exciting, I just started a new Job as a Marketing Director at Robotics Outpatient Center in downtown LA. So my upcoming year will be full of grinding & making big moves. What was it like shooting for FHM? Shooting for FHM has always been a huge goal of mine. So when I receive the news I was so excited. I instantly called one of my favorite photographers Brian B.…

I went to a Catholic primary school, but religion doesn’t play a big part in my life now. Like a lot of people, I’m not extremely religious nor extremely atheist; I’m somewhere in the middle. Maybe I’m just waiting for that sign – a number one album in the US and I’ll believe. I don’t think there’s a blanket meaning of life for everyone. Otherwise, the world would be pretty boring. It’s more fun when we create meaning to our lives as individuals. I find my meaning in music. It has driven my life for as long as I can remember; though I never thought it would become my life. I started doing bedroom videos as a hobby. “Bedroom videos” sounds a bit weird in print, doesn’t it? But I…

Were you excited to shoot for FHM? Super excited! There’s so many beautiful girls. So it’s an honor to be in FHM Tell us something surprising about you? I’m actually a pretty shy person. I like to keep to myself. I’m definitely a homebody. Describe yourself in one sentence. I like a little sass mixed with new adventures. What are some of your hobbies? I love to rescue kittens and find good homes for them. I also love to color. :) What Is your biggest turn on? Sense of humor What turns you off the most? Mean cruel people... assholes Describe to us your perfect date. Take me to Dave and busters, feed me and make me laugh. What would you consider to be your biggest challenge as a model…

“If you got sunburnt I’d laugh at first, but then I’d love to help you put your aftersun on” You’ve met a beautiful girl, and it’s all going well. In a fit of alcohol-induced madness, you book a surprise holiday. Then you realise you’ll have to spend the whole week trying to impress her. Luckily, Rebecca is here to help… 01 On the first night, the local sleazeball tries to muscle in on her “Getting chatted up by the locals is something every girl has to put up with when they’re away. Obviously, it’s awkward if I’m there with you. The best way to handle it is to give the guy a talking to, without being violent. If he isn’t listening you can be more forceful, but no girl is…

I’ve loved statistics since I was a boy. I had the Encyclopedia of British Football and used to read the appendix, including every league table from all four divisions since the game started, like a book. All I wanted as a kid was to be a professional footballer. I grew up in York and our house backed onto a playing field. I spent every waking hour on that pitch playing football. Only trouble was, I wasn’t very good. When I was 21 I took a job in London as a banker. I thought it would be a glamorous lifestyle but I hated every second of it. It was both the best and worst move I ever made; without it, I’d never have become a commentator. I thank my dad for…

I am so sorry,” says Anastasia Ashley from the back of a New York cab. “I was five minutes too late to check in so I missed my flight.” Of course, it’s all good. No need to apologise. Dontevenworryaboutit. Because when a woman so cool she makes Pharrell look like a poindexter and so sexy-fit that she’d shine in a room filled with Maria Sharapovas is staring back at you through a screen, you seem to forgive very quickly. Funny that. Welcome to FHM, Anastasia! Where have you just flown in from? I was in Florida. I was there to watch a golf event. I got to see Rory [McIlroy] and Ricky Fowler but I didn’t catch a glimpse of Tiger Woods. I’m actually a bit of an amateur golfer…

09 Watch the film Magic Mike Yes, it’s quite adorable how excited your girlfriend and all her mates get about Channing Tatum’s bumcheeks, but don’t ever attempt to get in on the fun yourself. You’ll just spend the rest of the evening staring at your own naked body in the mirror as you weep and eat Nutella out of the jar. 08 Flirt your way out of a tricky situation The flutter of your girlfriend’s eyelids can guarantee drinks after last orders and leniency from even the most Stalin-like of traffic wardens. Yet when you try to flirt your way through the barriers after ‘losing’ your train ticket, you’re carted off by British Transport Police quicker than you can say ‘restraining order’. Go figure! 07 Wear ‘sexy’ undies Girls have…