Innholdsfortegnelse for January 2025 i Psychologies

Lost for words Thank you so much for the very useful feature on festive small talk by Kellie Gillespie-Wright. Never having been at a loss for words myself, I was surprised to discover how awkward my new husband felt in social situations. Many years down the line, we have a son in exactly the same situation. Comfortable with people they know well, both men dread the kind of party where they are expected to ‘circulate’. I have made a copy of the feature for each of them and think that it should stand them in very good stead for the future. Maggie Colours can be our protector... It was whilst I was sitting in a wellbeing photography animation class that I was inspired to write my poem. I was suffering…

At this time of year, it can feel like we exist in a kind of liminal space, where both the past and future are cradled in the present. We haven’t quite kissed the old year goodbye, nor have we fully welcomed in the New Year. This creates fertile conditions for both reflection and aspiration, so it makes sense that many of us take stock and set goals. I am not one for New Year’s resolutions, however. Whilst I am ordinarily very much a fan of goal setting, resolutions feel far too prescriptive for my liking. And yet, there is something to be said for resolving to do things, scary things, the things we keep putting off. For some, this scary thing may be booking a dentist appointment, for others it…

When it’s time to get down to some financial admin, thoughts of other ‘must-do’ tasks can all-too easily creep in and take over, whether that’s taking the dog out for a stroll, checking for phone messages, or even completing the final episode of a TV series! However, such delaying tactics can leave ‘financial faffers’ significantly out of pocket. More than half (58%) of adults admit leaving things until the last minute has cost them financially, according to a survey of 2,000 people. More than a third (36%) confess to stuffing unpaid bills in a drawer, while one in six (16%) has ignored early warning signs of malfunctioning household appliances. Monday mornings are the prime time for putting things off, with 10am pinpointed as the most common time to put off…

It’s important to point out that January doesn’t have to come with any ideas for changes or ambitions. What matters most is understanding what will bring us happiness in the year ahead. What sparks joy for you? When do you feel most yourself, most content? How can you live in a way that’s true to what makes your heart sing? When we think ahead to the coming year, it can help to consider the ways we can live more in line with our values. So, if being a kind and supportive friend is a key value to you, think of the ways you can gently weave more of this into your year. It doesn’t have to mean filling your diary with lots of activities – what’s one small thing you…

Getting a nice early night is one thing, but how often have you gone to bed at 9pm, feeling all virtuous, just to spend the next three hours on your phone? Whether it’s plodding through your socials and making yourself feel inadequate, or scrolling endlessly through depressing news feeds, either way you can end up in a much worse state than if you’d just rolled into bed at 11pm and fallen asleep then. The reality is, when there’s so much news around us all day long, it’s increasingly easy to get sucked into a rabbit hole of articles, memes and Tweets (or should that be Xs?). But what is this doing to our mental health? Should we consider setting limits on how much content we are consuming, for our own…

If you’ve spent much time with children, you’ve probably heard the phrase ‘I had a really funny dream last night’ more times than you can count. But as we enter adulthood many of us find our dreamworld begins to pale and we remember fewer and fewer of our night-time adventures. No big deal, right? Chartered psychologist Dr Tina Grigoriou disagrees, on both counts. ‘We are always dreaming!’ she says. ‘Whether asleep or awake, our minds continuously weave together images, scenarios, and symbols, creating an inner landscape rich with meaning. In today’s fast-paced world, where dreams are often dismissed as fleeting curiosities, we may overlook the profound wisdom they offer. Dreams serve as gateways to our unconscious mind, providing guidance, creativity, and deep emotional insights – if only we learn how…

Session Two I had been thinking about Sylvie since our first session together. She had come to me for coaching about her relationship with her partner. Her friends had shared their concerns about Sylvie’s partner’s bullying and narcissistic behaviours and said they were concerned about her. They had told Sylvie that, given their concerns, they didn’t want to have anything more to do with her partner, but that she was always very welcome in their lives and that they were there to support her. Sylvie had fluctuated between defending her partner to me and acknowledging that he was at times manipulative. I had asked her to do some ‘homework’ to build her confidence by listing all of her positive characteristics. When Sylvie arrived for her second session, she looked strained…

Being in touch with your values, and thinking about what you really want, can help you find the motivation to make a change. Sometimes though, there can be things that make it harder to move forwards. ‘We all have an instinct to want to realise our potential, what’s sometimes known as “self-actualisation”, but many different factors have an impact on whether we feel capable and motivated to try something new, or to reach for a goal,’ explains counsellor Georgina Sturmer. ‘Our life circumstances, our self-esteem, our relationships, and our upbringing can all play a role in how we feel about approaching new things, and whether we feel excited, motivated, daunted, frightened or stuck. This can leave us inactive, or sometimes in a state of self-sabotage. As there are so many…

On the first day of January I often strip down to nothing, or almost nothing, and submerge myself in icy water. It is a baptism of sorts, a way to start afresh, but it is also a reminder that I am alive and that the world is still spinning. This year, instead of a resolution, I am drawn to the idea of revolution, in every sense of the word. There is the concept of revolving, of our planet turning on its axis amongst the stars, bruised and abused but relentlessly rotating. It is impossible to reflect upon the disappearing year and plan for the one ahead without considering the state of our planet. The climate emergency is affecting more and more of us, forcing us to confront what has been…

It’s all too easy to put our health on hold, telling ourselves we’ll ‘catch up’ on sleep, ‘fix’ our eating habits, or ‘get fit’ someday. And if you’ve been letting things slide a bit during the Christmas season and even before, the chances are, you’ve been putting it off until the new year. However, once January 2 rolls around, it can feel like a challenge to lift your head off the pillow in the morning, let alone start a punishing new health and fitness regime. But what if you could make meaningful, manageable changes that enhance your health without a complete overhaul? This four-week guide offers just that, featuring insights from nutritionist Evie Whitehead, wellness coach Emma Hackett, sleep specialist Alison Francis (Anandi, The Sleep Guru), and intuitive fitness coach…

A few years ago, I bought a large table – a table so big that it only just fits in the house. Above it hangs a similarly enormous poster that reads ‘There will always be a space for you at this table’. While there are often plenty of people gathered around it (for meetings, meals, and meetings over meals), there’s rarely much space to go around. But even when it’s a tight squeeze, we somehow always manage to fit one more person in. Some days, it’s not people that fill the space, but stuff. There’s the pile of items I’ve unloaded from the car; clothes waiting to be put away; homework waiting to be done; broken gadgets; or the box of dog food that just arrived. If anything goes missing…

Stand to attention! Everyone likes a nice sit down – but vegging out for long periods can sabotage your health, even if you’re quite active, it seems. A study of more than 1,000 people aged 28 to 49, including 730 twins, found meeting minimum activity recommendations isn’t enough to counter endless sedentary hours. Participants in the CU Boulder and University of California Riverside research were chair-bound for almost nine hours a day on average. The more they sat, the older they looked, with higher heart and metabolic ageing. Study authors say cutting that time, getting more vigorous exercise or a combination are needed to reduce the risk of premature ageing. 3 nourishing reads… 1 Do Nourish by Sarah Bayliss (£9.99, Do Book). Expert advice on how to make easy but…

For many of us, the beginning of a new year heralds an exciting opportunity to implement positive change and fill up on fresh hope for the future; a chance, in short, to wipe the slate clean, leave bad habits firmly in the past, and look forward to 12 months of infinite possibilities. However, if you’re anything like me, you might also find that those initial feelings of motivation (and even desperation) to overhaul your life overnight can quickly morph into feelings of depression and downright misery as the realisation hits you on day three that you’ve already failed to go the gym and meditate every day, and you’re now coming dangerously close to opening that leftover bottle of Christmas wine in a bid to cheer yourself up – despite the…

You’ve identified your values and what you’d like to do in 2025. Maybe it’s about drafting a novel, organising that much longed for holiday, starting up a business, getting back into yoga, or anything else that makes your heart sing. But taking the first steps can be hard, even when we know what it is that we truly want. ‘The very first thing is to ask yourself the question: what is the easiest, quickest or most desirable action I can take today?’ says Carroll. Getting started is usually the hardest part. As a writer, the blank page is daunting, and starting the day with an empty Word document doesn’t tend to fill me with energy. I take Carroll’s advice, and think about what would help me get the ball rolling…

December 31st draws a solid line under the year, neatly demarcating an ending. We count down from ten to the clock striking midnight before fireworks crack the air wide open, filling it with light and promise, heralding the start of the new year. I think about traditions associated with welcoming in the new year, such as Ireland’s custom of opening doors and windows to release the old year and see in the new. At the heart of these traditions is an awareness that in order to make room for what is to come, we must first see to ushering out what has come before. In this way, endings can often symbolise closure, but just because something has ended doesn’t always mean that closure can take place. What if there are…

“Create time for calming activities so they become meaningful and intentional” Once the fairy lights are packed away, and it is no longer acceptable to eat chocolates from morning to night, the winter evenings can start to drag a little. But what causes these sluggish feelings and how can we help ourselves to recharge? ‘The reduction in daylight and sunshine can lower serotonin levels, a brain chemical responsible for regulating our sense of wellbeing,’ explains Helen Wells, psychotherapist and clinical director at The Dawn Rehab Thailand. ‘Less sunlight can disrupt our circadian rhythm, the body’s internal clock that regulates sleep-wake cycles and other physiological processes. When this rhythm is disturbed, it can lead to sleep disturbances, fatigue, and irritability.’ With less exposure to natural daylight, our bodies produce more melatonin,…

Self-care for the winter Ayurvedic tips for staying grounded and healthy ‘As winter settles in, Ayurveda teaches us to align with the season through warming, grounding, and nurturing practices’ shares Avanti Kumar Singh, MD, author of The Longevity Formula and host of The Healing Catalyst Podcast. ‘Winter is governed by the Vata dosha, characterized by cold, dryness, and movement. ‘To stay balanced and maintain wellness, it’s essential to adapt your daily routines to counterbalance these qualities.” Here are 5 Ayurvedic tips to help you thrive this winter... 1 Nourish your body with warming, seasonal foods Focus on nourishing meals like soups, stews, and porridges with seasonal vegetables such as root vegetables and squashes. Adding warming spices like ginger, cinnamon, turmeric and cumin also enhances digestion and circulation. 2 Self-massage with warm oil…