Innholdsfortegnelse for Sep/Oct 2025 i Fairlady

There’s a clip doing the rounds in which a young Gen Z woman, Freya India, talks about her generation’s battles with mental health. Recorded during a panel discussion hosted by the Institute for the Public Life of Art and Ideas, the clip is worth tracking down if you can. The gist is that Gen Z have always lived in a world where they can ‘pretty much have anything they want without any human interaction’; they’ve got delivery apps, dating apps, online lectures, games… They never need to interact with anyone. As a result, they have no understanding of community. ‘This idea that online communities are a lifeline is a joke to me,’ Freya says. ‘There’s no such thing as an online community – it’s a complete oxymoron. This idea that…

More than a century after psychotherapist Carl Jung first introduced the terms ‘introvert’ and ‘extrovert’, experts are still arguing about what actually makes someone an introvert. Extroverts, not so much. We haven’t heard a word of complaint from them. Most likely because they rarely take issue with their label – and why would they? It’s fairly unanimously seen as a positive. ‘Extroverts have always tended to benefit from the assumption that their way of doing life was the psychologically healthy one,’ writes social psychologist Bella DePaulo. Susan Cain, the author of Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking (which is seen as a defining text when it comes to introversion) calls this the ‘Extrovert Ideal’: ‘the omni-present belief that the ideal self is gregarious, alpha…

Just when you thought you’d wrapped your head around ‘dad bods’ and ‘short kings’, the internet has latched onto a new, oddly specific crush: the rodent man. The term refers to unconventionally attractive men – lean rather than muscular, with angular features and a certain mousy charm. According to a now-viral New York Times discussion, the appeal lies in rejecting airbrushed perfection in favour of something more real – and endearingly imperfect. So who qualifies for this New Rat Pack? Here’s a spotter’s guide to Hollywood’s leading rodent men. ◗ TIMOTHÉE CHALAMET The Arthouse Mouse Rodent qualities: Timothée is the founding father of this genre. Sharp-featured and poetically dishevelled, he is often described as elfin – not in the Santa’s helper sense, but in the way of a storybook prince who…

HOT NIGHT OUT IS COMING TO JOBURG! SAVE THE DATE: Saturday, 27 September 2025 GET READY, JOBURG – HOT! NIGHT OUT IS HEADED YOUR WAY, AND IT’S GOING TO BE BOLD, BRILLIANT AND ABSOLUTELY NOT-TO-BE-MISSED! MENOPAUSE. MIDLIFE. NO FILTER. A POWERHOUSE PANEL of EXPERTS with all the latest & best advice, hosted by FAIRLADY editor Suzy Brokensha. ALL THE HELP YOU NEED, IN ONE ROOM.WITH BUBBLES & A FABULOUS GOODIE BAG! WHERE: The Venue, Melrose Arch, Johannesburg WHEN: Saturday, 27 September 2025, 10am–2 pm TICKETS: R895 (This includes expert talks, wine, canapés, a fabulous goodie bag and the latest issue of HOT!) BOOK NOW: quicket.co.za (Search HOT! Night Out Jhb) Tickets are limited. STEP INTO THE BEAUTY & WELLNESS LOUNGE, POWERED BY: • SKIN functional • Masodi Beauty • Solal ◗…

1. Have you ever wanted to stop eating and found you just couldn’t? 2. Do you constantly think about food or your weight? 3. Do you find yourself attempting one diet or food plan after another, with no lasting success? 4. Do you binge and then ‘get rid of the binge’ through vomiting, exercise, laxatives or other forms of purging? 5. Do you eat differently in private than you do in front of other people? 6. Has a doctor or a family member ever approached you with concern about your eating habits or weight? 7. Do you eat large quantities of food at one time (binge)? 8. Is your weight a problem due to your ‘nibbling’ all day long? 9. Do you eat to escape from your feelings? 10. Do you…

When Rachel Kolisi traded in her swanky Mercedes for a borrowed Toyota Yaris – and later a new Jetour – it got people, especially women, thinking: What does success really look like in today’s world? Women have been part of the workforce for decades, building our own financial future. Now, with our independence more firmly in place, our focus is starting to shift. More and more women are choosing not to chase status symbols but to find success through simplicity, purpose and freedom. A more intentional life is beginning to feel aspirational – not because it looks impressive but because it feels right. At the end of 2024, I walked away from the rat race of a large global corporation. I said goodbye to a cushy salary and some pretty…

◗ BELLY BREATHING Breathe in slowly through your nose and out through your mouth, focusing on your belly gently rising and falling, even placing your hand there to feel it. Best for: Beginners, and for doing any time. Practise a few minutes a day so that you can tap into it in times of stress. UCT Lung Institute investigations have shown it improves how fast the lungs expand and contract, and helps strengthen the diaphragm muscle, which enables deep breathing. ◗ BOX BREATHING As a box has four sides, this has four steps: Inhale for four counts, hold your breath for four, exhale for four, and hold after your exhale for another four. Repeat. Counting silently can help calm and anchor you like a meditation mantra. Best for: A quick…

There is something undeniably romantic about having a signature scent. Something touching about the idea that it instantly conjures happy memories – or sends your loved ones into a tearful reverie once you’ve slipped off this mortal coil. It’s a nice thought. But really, when you think about it, committing to just one fragrance does seem quite limiting. No one would expect you to eat the same meal every day, or wear the same outfit day in and day out regardless of your mood, the weather or the occasion. And you certainly wouldn’t don the same outfit for a date as you would to a meeting. So why not embrace the idea of a ‘scent wardrobe’ – a multifaceted collection of fragrances? An interesting thing to note is that layering…

Easy Air Fryer by Jamie Oliver, Penguin Michael Joseph, 2025, about R550 ◗ TERIYAKI PORK RIBS Serves 2 Prep + cooking time: 1 hour • 40g caster sugar• 45ml (3 tbsp) low-salt soya sauce• 15ml (1 tbsp) rice wine vinegar• 300ml (11/5cups) water• 2 cm-piece of ginger• 1 garlic clove• 15ml (1 tbsp) cornflour• 1 rack of baby back ribs (about 600 g)• olive oil• 2 spring onions 1. Remove the shelf from the air-fryer drawer and go in with the sugar, soya sauce, rice wine vinegar and water. Peel and finely grate in the ginger and garlic, add the cornflour and mix to combine, then replace the shelf. 2. Rub the rack of ribs with a little olive oil and a pinch of sea salt, then place it on…

ACROSS 1. Devise (plan) (4,3) 6. Health food product 11. Short scarves 15. Furious 16. Attract (penalty) 17. Nonsense 18. Replica 21. Sloping letters 22. Excavate mud 23. Verb modifier 24. Milliner 28. Assembly room 30. Humanities faculty 32. Country 35. Frostier 37. Fraternities 38. Aunt and … 40. Throat drop 43. Looked forward to 45. Attach (3,2) 47. Nightmare, bad … 48. Rain shields 52. Mail hub (1,1,1) 53. Diversify (6,3) 56. Not genuine 58. Zimbabwe’s neighbour 60. Emblems 61. Small islands 62. Metal palings 64. … and feather 65. Droop 67. Finnish city 69. Appraise 72. Fangs 75. Trial panel 77. As a gamble, on … 78. Guitarist, … Clapton 79. Assist illegally 81. More massive 83. Holy person 84. Official trade ban 86. Become less dense 87.…

MegaXword 1 MegaXword 2 Brainteaser 1 Brainteaser 2 Sudoku 1 Very easy 2 Easy 3 Medium 4 Difficult 5 Very easy 6 Easy 7 Medium 8 Difficult Word search 1 2 3 4 Code words 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 Cryptic 1 ACROSS: 1. Long-distance 8. Knee-deep 9. Stop 11. Panto 12. Ocarina 13. Itch 15. Aria 19. Glimmer 20. Iceni 22. Oaks 23. Michigan 24. Entertaining DOWN: 2. Ocean 3. Gideon 4. Icebox 5. Nattier 6. Explanations 7. Skipping-rope 10. Pay 14. Cricket 16. Amp 17. Eroica 18. Lichen 21. Elgin Cryptic 2 ACROSS: 2. Paper 5. Life 7. Prop 8. Research 9. Dismayed 11. Rush 12. Border terrier 15. Ends 17. Problems 19. Convulse 21. Bird 22. Pent 23. Satyr DOWN: 1. Portico 2. Pip…

MIDDLE MANAGEMENT Buckle up! These stylish belts add shape in a cinch. ALL EARS Gold reigns supreme this spring, embellished with cool tones, texture and pearlescent accents. WRAP PARTY Worn by Audrey Hepburn, Marilyn Monroe and Grace Kelly in their heyday, silky scarves have staged a comeback. CARRIED AWAY Studded, structured, slouchy… Take your pick – there’s a bevy of bags to choose from. A FRESH PAIR OF EYES Optical frames are arguably the most pivotal accessory you can buy! Opt for ones that are easy on the eye. NECK AND NECK Adorn a simple neckline with dangly pendants, memento charms or pearls. GOODY TWO-SHOES Walk this way for a little peep of toe, a metallic glint or two, and platforms aplenty.…

A long with his colleagues Jennifer Grimes and Courtney Brown, Cheek came up with a new theory – that there are four types of introversion, with one general uniting factor: the tendency to turn inwards rather than outwards. Introverts, he says, are usually a mix of all four types rather than falling into just one category. 1 SOCIAL INTROVERT ◗ ‘I would rather go for dinner with one or two close friends than have a big party to celebrate my birthday.’ ◗ ‘I hate small talk, but I like having in-depth, one-on-one conversations.’ ◗ ‘I enjoy my own company and like to set aside time to just be by myself.’ ◗ ‘I am selective about who I spend my time with.’ ◗ ‘I feel drained after hanging out with other…

The first scene in The Strange Case of Jane O. came to Karen Thompson Walker while she was working on her previous novel, The Dreamers. ‘As part of my research, I had returned to an author I really love: Oliver Sacks. My first creative writing teacher in college recommended his book The Man Who Mistook His Wife for a Hat and Other Clinical Tales.’ Neurologist Sacks’s evocative case histories of some of his patients tell the stories of people living with rare and uncanny brain disorders. Some are so fantastical you can hardly believe they’re real. ‘There was a man who believed it was the year 1945, although 30 years had passed since then. Another became suddenly convinced that his own leg was really someone else’s.’ Given that memory is…

I knew disturbingly little about Milan prior to this trip. Let’s see. Fashion capital. A famous football team? (Just don’t ask me to name an actual player.) And… La Scala opera house. That’s pretty much it. My only other point of reference is Edna Mode in The Incredibles saying the line ‘Milan, dahling, Milan’ when asked about a recent headline-making runway show. A bit of research revealed that yes, it is a shopping haven. If you have the euros to spend on designer brands. And there are, of course, great cocktails and food to be had. (Duh, it’s Italy.) But it also has some hidden gems in terms of art, incredibly picturesque spaces, and loads of culture to soak up – preferably with a Negroni in hand. Because I went in…

Majesty Wines Caroline Ngwenya Some people fall in love over candlelight and string quartets. Caroline fell in love with a wine label and a jaw-dropping R4000 price tag. Now, years later, she is a certified sommelier and the founder of The High Cellar and The Black Wine Renaissance Expo, and she has her own wine label. What drew you to wine, and how did that initial interest spark your career? I was studying communications and playing cricket on a scholarship. Like most students, I needed extra income, so I started waitressing. One night at the restaurant, I came across a wine on the menu, Mvemve Raats MR de Compostella, priced at R4000. I’d never seen wine cost that much before and I couldn’t stop wondering, what makes a bottle worth…

While food addiction is not formally recognised in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5), a growing body of research supports its existence as a behavioural addiction, particularly in response to ultra-processed, hyper-palatable foods. These foods aren’t just engineered for taste; they’re also designed to hijack your brain’s reward system, making moderation nearly impossible. ‘Ultra-processed foods trigger the brain’s reward pathways in much the same way as alcohol and other addictive substances do,’ says Tamzyn Murphy, a Cape Town-based dietitian and head of content at Nutrition Network. And the more we eat them, the harder it becomes to stop. Food manufacturers have large teams of scientists, engineers and psychologists designing products that will stand out in an increasingly competitive marketplace. One successful tactic is called vanishing caloric density,…

1 Start early and automate. ‘Starting early takes the pressure off later, and gives you room to enjoy simple pleasures.’ The most effective way to do this is to automate. Set up debit orders into unit trusts or retirement funds. This ‘pay yourself first’ approach ensures your most important goals are met on autopilot, allowing for guilt-free spending of what’s left. 2 Invest with patience, not panic. Women have a powerful natural advantage as investors. ‘Research shows that women tend to stick to their investment plans during market volatility rather than panic-selling, which is a form of quiet caution that pays off,’ Charize says. Embrace this long-term view. ‘The goal is sustainable, well-planned growth aligned with your goals, not reckless bets for short-term gains.’ 3 Preserve your power when you…

When we talk about ‘genetics’ in breast cancer, we need to distinguish between two distinct factors, says clinical and radiation oncologist Dr Lizanne Langenhoven. The first is a woman’s inherited genetic makeup, which influences her likelihood of developing breast cancer. The second comes into play after a diagnosis; the genetic characteristics of the cancer itself need to be considered, regardless of whether the person carries a known breast cancer gene. Tumour-specific traits determine the most effective course of treatment. INHERITING THE GENE Each parent contributes half of our genetic makeup when we are conceived. Think of it as receiving a recipe book from each parent, with the necessary information to create all the parts of a living human being. Some families have an error in the recipe for the so-called…

All the Other Mothers Hate Me by Sarah Harman Thirty-one-year-old Florence Grimes has a lifelong habit of taking the easy way out. Single, broke and still licking her wounds after the spectacular collapse of her girl-band career, she has exactly one reason to get out of bed in the morning: her 10-year-old son Dylan. But when Dylan’s classmate (and local frozen-food empire heir) Alfie Risby mysteriously vanishes during a school trip, Dylan becomes the prime suspect. To clear his name (or at least cover up the increasingly suspicious evidence that Dylan might know more than he’s letting on), Flo decides to play detective. She is, of course, entirely unqualified for the role, but thankfully Jenny, the composed and capable new mom at Dylan’s fancy school, hasn’t yet been warned off…

ACROSS 1. Shopfront renovation 5. Red legumes (6,5) 11. Cataracts 15. Which person? 16. Chinese lunch, yum … 17. OJ, … juice 19. Ventilation passage 21. Honolulu hello 23. Occur (4,2) 25. Tree, copper … 27. Fingernail protein 28. Force away 30. Strait-laced 31. Unorthodox doctrine 32. Actor, … Seagal 33. Insect phase 34. Final match 35. Quiver 36. Drastic 38. Diva’s song 40. Fuse 42. Resonate 44. Seize 45. Sunhat peak 46. Has 48. Fatal 49. App taxi 50. Norway’s capital 51. Obtains by sponging 52. Bill of fare 53. Noticed 54. Smell strongly 55. Mideast sultanate 56. Green tea powder 58. Bold 59. Tie-up 61. Spirited horse 63. Gene acid (1,1,1) 64. French ‘la’ 65. Russian monarchs 67. Money, filthy … 69. United (2,3) 71. Sprite 73. Suspect’s…

Winners! Congrats to our WINNERS MegaXword 199 J. Bates, Somerset West Brainteaser 198 D. Scrutton, Lonehill A. Olver, Noordhoek Manor C. Macleod, Hermanus HOW TO ENTER MEGAXWORD & BRAINTEASER The MegaXword and Brainteaser crossword competitions close on 16 October 2025. Scan or photograph your completed crossword and email it to puzzles@fairlady.com with MegaXword 201 or Brainteaser 200 in the subject line, and provide your name, residential or postal address, email address and phone number. Digital copies of the crosswords are allowed, but photocopies are not allowed. Delivery of prizes may take up to six weeks after notification. STANDARD TERMS AND CONDITIONS 1. Competitions and giveaways are open to permanent residents of South Africa over the age of 18. 2. Staff members of the respective prize sponsors and Media24, as well…

When Jeremy Allen White first appeared in that Calvin Klein ad – you know, the one with the abs, the angst and all the raw magnetism – the internet didn’t just swoon, it short-circuited. And while smoking is a non-negotiable deal-breaker for me (the smell, the health risks, the whole mess of it), there’s something about watching him chain-smoking in The Bear, sweat-soaked and emotionally volatile, that puts all my principles on a brief, shameful pause. This is no cookie-cutter leading man. Jeremy is twitchy, tender and slightly tragic – like he’s one bad day away from falling apart. Then, of course, there’s Pedro Pascal. Grizzled, guarded and grief-stricken as Joel in The Last of Us, his emotional restraint only makes the rare moments of softness hit harder. The indisputable…

◗ ‘When I was in college, I became really enamoured with realism and modernism, and writers like Virginia Woolf who could do such a wonderful job with the small moments of ordinary life. I think I developed a scepticism toward genre stories or fantastical stories. But then I read Blindness by José Saramago, and it brought together everything I love. It had a real seriousness, a lot of philosophical ideas and a lot of attention to character – but it also had this big science-fiction premise, which is a city where suddenly everyone loses their eyesight at the same time in a contagion. Bringing those two sides of my reader self together was really exciting and stuck with me. That was the beginning of my writing in this vein.’ ◗…

‘It’s not necessarily a bad thing to fight,’ Perel says. ‘There are plenty of strong yet volatile couples, colleagues and friends. But certain lines should not be crossed, and it’s important to repair.’ Here are some pointers on how to have better arguments. ◗ STOP BICKERING ‘Bickering is low-intensity chronic warfare,’ Perel says. This kind of constant negative friction will never produce the results you’re hoping for. ‘It produces the actual opposite effect of what we seek when we are loved or when we love somebody, which is to feel good about ourselves. And if as a result of being with someone you end up feeling lousy, unloved, uncared for, devalued, inadequate, inept… you really are on the other side of the tracks.’ Criticism is also a huge predictor when…

When a young journalist from Kazakhstan nervously addressed Emma Stone by her birth name, Emily, at a press conference during the 2024 Cannes Film Festival, he probably didn’t expect to go viral. But the actress’s warm response (‘That’s my name!’ she beamed) sparked an international moment of charm and serendipity. In May 2025, the two were reunited at a press event for Eddington, the new Ari Aster thriller. ‘Very good to see you,’ she told him sincerely, as he credited the exchange with changing the course of his career. ‘I’m so happy that a name could do that,’ she replied. FROM EMILY TO EMMA By the time Emily turned 15, she had set her sights on Hollywood and employed a rather unconventional method to persuade her parents, Krista and Jeff…

I was 37 years old, standing at the Trevi Fountain, rubbing my coin for extra luck before tossing it into the water. The wish I made was the same one I’d whispered over every birthday candle, every fallen eyelash, every shooting star since I was 10 years old: Universe, please, let me eat whatever I want and be thin. That summer, I had lost 15 kilos with the help of a stern, expensive diet coach. She told me what to eat and, at the end of the day, I’d report back like a schoolgirl – yes, I ate the salad. No, I didn’t touch the bread. Rome, with its gelaterie on every corner, was my reward for months of white-knuckled willpower. And for a brief moment it worked. But like every…

The sandwich generation. The term was first coined in 1981 when American social worker Dorothy Miller used it to describe women in their 30s and 40s who were ‘sandwiched’ between caring for young children and their elderly parents. These days, the concept has expanded to reflect more complex family structures and care dynamics as well, such as supporting young adult children. While multigenerational living has been the norm in Asian countries for decades, the perfect storm of longevity and delayed parenthood has seen this trend growing in other parts of the world too. Parents who have outlived their retirement savings or just not saved enough shift the responsibility of care and support to their children, who, in turn, are in the thick of dealing with school runs or grown-up children…

3 TOP EYE CREAMS I spy… three creams to plump and perk up the delicate skin around your eyes. 1 Gatineau Collagene Expert Eye Cream Clinically proven to reduce dark circles, improve puffiness, and blur dehydration and expression lines. Dot it on and let this weightless cream work its magic. (R1 195; launching in September) 2 YEARNSKIN Hydra Glow Eye Cream A lifesaver for when you’ve stayed up way too late, scrolling… This lightweight, fast-absorbing eye cream is infused with powerful peptides, nourishing plant extracts, and illuminating minerals to refresh tired eyes, reduce puffiness, diminish fine lines and restore radiance. (R349) 3 Institut Esthederm Intensive Retinol Eye Lifting Balm With stabilised retinol to accelerate cell renewal and stimulate collagen and elastin synthesis; biomimetic peptide and caffeine to address dark circles…

Page 141 LAMB BIRYANI (BREYANI) Page 142 PERI-PERI CHICKEN FLATTIE Page 142 DURBAN BEAN CURRY Page 144 BRAAIED SNOEK WITH APRICOT JAM MARINADE 1 LAMB BIRYANI (BREYANI) Serves 8 One of the jewels in the crown of Indian and Cape Malay cooking is a well-made biryani (also called ‘breyani’ in the Western Cape) with lamb, mutton, chicken or fish. Originally a Moghul-Indian dish from Old Persia, it made its way to South Africa when Indian labourers were brought here under British rule during the 19th century. While the original Moghul-Indian biryani is mild and refined, South African versions are more robustly spiced, especially in Indian communities. It is served at most large festive gatherings in Indian and Cape Muslim communities, with layers of fragrant basmati rice (tinged yellow with saffron), tender marinated…

Best buy! PHILIPS 3000 SERIES (NA351) 9 L; 2 750 W R4 699; YUPPIECHEF This air fryer has an excellent balance of power, performance and versatility, and delivered the most consistent cooking results in our tests. Everything we prepared came out evenly cooked and well browned. Chicken was juicy with perfectly crisp skin; vegetables were cooked through; crumbed chicken retained its crunch; fries were evenly crisp; and pastries turned out beautifully flaky. Browning was lighter than with some of the other air fryers, but the overall results were impressive. Cooking times weren’t the fastest, but they were reliable and consistent. With one 3 L basket and one 6 L basket, this air fryer gives you the flexibility to cook generous portions or multiple dishes at once – ideal for roasting…

Turn to page 165 for the solution to MegaXword 199, and to page 176 for entry details and winners’ names. ACROSS 1. Chivalry rank 6. Dawdles 10. Relaxes (muscles) 15. Chooses 18. Actor, … Swayze 19. Confection, … ice 20. Serving platter 22. Ship’s bunks 23. Refugee 24. Enlists 25. Neither 26. Acute anxiety 28. Considers 30. Tertiary campus 31. Undisguised 32. Eyeball 33. Utilises 34. Uniform 35. Duck’s bill 37. Advantage 39. Tune 40. Affectedly dainty 42. Betting game 45. Doctor’s … manner 48. Dull 49. Greenish-blue 50. Gullible 53. Yahoo! 54. Writer, … Cussler 56. Waste tunnel 59. … Cologne (3,2) 61. Lout 62. Japan’s iconic peak 63. Fah, soh, … 64. iPhone program 65. Capture 66. Owing 68. Seedless citrus (5,6) 69. Gallivant (about) 70. Condemnation 71.…

1 Solution on page 175 2 Solution on page 175 3 Solution on page 175 4 Solution on page 175 NB In these puzzles, each letter of the alphabet has been replaced with a number. You need to decide which letter is represented by which number. To start you off, we reveal the codes for a few letters. With these letters filled in throughout the puzzle, you’ll have enough clues to work out words and discover other letters. 5 Solution on page 175 6 Solution on page 175 7 Solution on page 175 8 Solution on page 175…

The day before we leave for any holiday is Packing Fight Day. We’ve learnt some short cuts during the nearly three decades we’ve been doing this and have now – what do HR call it just before they retrench everyone? – ‘managed inefficiencies’ well enough to cut actual fighting time down to about five minutes (although we’re still losing a fair amount of time to General Seething). We plan to streamline the Packing Fight even further to these three simple steps: STEP 1 One of us says, ‘Do we really need to take this?’ STEP 2 Accept that any actual discussion is pointless because we’ve already said pretty much everything there is to say: He wants to pack tools and bikes and bloody boats, and I want to pack crates…

Well, you only need to put one foot in front of the other with FAIRLADY’s sixweek walking workout programme and healthy meal plan. Walking is one of the best forms of exercise there is. Any able-bodied person can do it anywhere – and because it’s low-impact, it’s easy on your joints and your risk of injury is low. This at-home workout programme is suitable for every fitness level, and gives you everything you need to trim centimetres off your waist, plus sculpt and tone your figure if you want to take it to the next level. You’ll receive weekly walking targets, workouts to keep you strong and fit, and a nutritious low-carb meal plan to give your body the right fuel – one less thing to think about! No gym?…