Innholdsfortegnelse for May 2018 i Cosmopolitan

This Month on Cosmopolitan.com We’re partnering with Rock the Vote to make sure all eligible women are registered to cast a ballot in this year’s midterm primaries and general elections. Head online to check out our custom voter registration (and registration lookup) tools, and use #CosmoVotes to help spread the word! YOUR NEXT ESCAPE IS ON US! Enter for a chance to win the Ultimate Diva trip to New Orleans to enjoy a FestiGals Girlfriends Getaway full of fun, festivity, and empowerment for you and three of your besties! See page 191 and DivaGetaway.Cosmopolitan.com for details. WORKING FROM NINE to Wine Just Sayin’ Snap and share this month’s inspo on your social channels with the hashtag #CosmoInspo. Q&A WITH KATE WHITE Author of The Gutsy Girl Handbook and former editor-in-chief…

My happy place: A bookstore or library. When I first moved to L.A. and knew no one, I would wander around Book Soup or the Beverly Hills Public Library. The last time I was nervous: Every night before I made my entrance in the play Kings. But I developed a coping technique: I’d say, “I’m not nervous, I’m excited!” out loud. It helped. Current #WCW: My Kings costars: Aya Cash (you have to watch her on You’re the Worst) and Eisa Davis (she writes for Netflix’s She’s Gotta Have It). Popular misconception about me: Sometimes people confuse me with my characters. I love (Community’s) Britta and (Love’s) Mickey, but I’m not really like them in real life. By this time next year, I want to: Produce and direct more documentaries…

Yell at the news lately? See something in your hood that sucks? Feel like you need to fix a big problem? It’s time to take action—and it’s easier than you think. Here, totally inspiring activists and agents of change lay out your steps to saving the world. (Okay, well, at least to making a difference.) I.D. YOUR CAUSE Think local. Often, you can make the biggest impact in or near your hometown. For example, you can address a road that needs streetlights or a homeless shelter that lacks funding. “You understand the landscape,” says social entrepreneur Erin Schrode, COO of #ChefsForPuertoRico. “Look around your area and ask, What are our pain points? What can I do?” Then focus. If there’s an uptick of mental-health issues on your campus, don’t try…

Open your Amazon App Tap the camera icon Choose SmileCode Scan to shop!…

Best Longwear Lipstick “Possibly the longest-lasting lippie ever. I applied it at 10 a.m., drank several cups of coffee and water, ate a salad with oil dressing, snacked throughout the day, and at 7 p.m.? The pigment hadn’t faded. Holy-grail status.” —KATE FOSTER, ASSOCIATE BEAUTY EDITOR Best Full-Coverage Foundation “It passed the greatest torture test known to women—being a bridesmaid—staying put through an outdoor wedding in 90-degree Arizona with zero shade. It made my skin look so flawless, I got triple-digit Likes on my Insta.” —MARTA TOPRAN, BEAUTY DIRECTOR Best Bronzer “This ultra-fine powder—available in light, medium, and deep—warms up my complexion in a few swipes with a bronze that looks natural and luminous, exactly as the name promises.” —MADDIE ABERMAN, BEAUTY EDITOR Best Mascara “Name what you look for…

Best Leave-In Conditioner “Hydration is key to fixing everything: frizz, damage, dullness, you name it. This spray contains three heavy hitters (hyaluronic acid, murumuru butter, and coconut milk) and left my hair looking all kinds of better for days.” —MADDIE ABERMAN, BEAUTY EDITOR Best Conditioner “My fine strands get weighed down faster than you can say conditioner. Solution: this foam version that keeps my hair feeling light, fluffy, and nourished all at once.” —M.A. Best Volumizing Spray “I use this lightweight spritz the same way I do my favorite facial mist: anytime, anywhere, whenever I need a little bit of extra oomph.” —LAUREN BALSAMO, SENIOR BEAUTY EDITOR Best Curl Cream “Sticky gels used to be my go-to for twist-outs. They’re crazy-strong, but the next day, I have to explain the…

Healthy, glowing skin starts in the gut, says Cosmo contributing dermatologist Whitney Bowe, MD, who is known in the skincare world for her integrated approach to beauty and in-depth research on the connection between the gut and skin microbiomes (aka ecosystems of living bacteria). “Patients dealing with acne, rosacea, eczema, or premature aging can benefit from my three-week plan, which introduces diet, lifestyle, and skin-care habits to reset the gut flora and improve skin,” explains Dr. Bowe. Get the quickie download here, and pick up Dr. Bowe’s new book, The Beauty of Dirty Skin, for healthy recipes, workout ideas, skin-care tips, and more. 1 WEEK BE GOOD TO YOUR GUT Skip Processed Foods They slow digestion, says Dr. Bowe, and the resulting stagnation causes an overgrowth of unhealthy bacteria, potentially…

Despite today’s technological boom, practices that tap into ancient and mystical rituals are generating a ton of buzz among 20somethings. The search term crystals currently has 6.8 million tags on Instagram, saves for meditation went up 229 percent on Pinterest in the last year, and—all in all—the mindfulness industry raked in more than $1 billion over each of the past two years. Given the popularity surge, it’s not surprising that beauty brands are out to prove that deeper inner awareness can sync up to outer radiance. Fresh’s Lotus Youth Preserve Rescue Mask launched with four guided meditations by Jackie Stewart, an instructor at MNDFL meditation studio in NYC. Every product in Miranda Kerr’s line, KORA Organics, touches rose quartz—which is said to promote love and acceptance—during production. And each batch…

YOUR EXCUSE Sunscreen feels heavy and makes me look greasy. REALITY CHECK New formulas are better than ever. The fluffy, light-as-air texture of Olay Whips is absorbed fast and leaves a matte finish (perfect for under makeup). Find one you love, and wear it every day. YOUR EXCUSE I need vitamin D for bone health. REALITY CHECK No study has ever found that sunscreen use leads to a vitamin-D deficiency. Even with a perfect application, a small amount of UVB rays reaches your skin, says Jordana Herschthal, MD, a Florida derm. YOUR EXCUSE I’m not planning to be outside long. REALITY CHECK Do you commute or sit by a window? Then you need SPF. “Sun damage is cumulative, meaning incremental exposure ups your odds for premature aging and skin cancer,”…

Boxers and Shirtless It’s a good bet that comfort is key for him. With that priority, he’s likely a solid, down-to-earth type who loves snuggling more than showing off. Full-On Pj’s Unless it’s freezing, covering up signals a guy who might be a bit shy. Aww. You may have to lure him out of his shell by helping to peel off his layers. Naked He may be a chill type, since colder temps mean better sleep. Also, according to clinical psychologist Samantha Rodman, PhD, “sleeping nude suggests he’s confident.” Briefs and Tank Top This dude is proud of his body and wants to be admired in the bedroom, suggests Rodman. Let him know you enjoy the view. 88 PERCENT OF MEN ARE IN FAVOR OF FLIRTING AT THE GYM. HE’S…

Caspering \kas·per·ing\ n A friendlier—if still frustrating—type of ghosting. The person hasn’t asked you out again, but they usually reply very nicely to your texts. Catch and Release \ kach and ri·les\ vb When someone puts all their effort into pursuing you until they “catch” you. But as soon as you finally agree to a date, they lose interest in favor of a new target. Cushioning \ku·sh n·ing\ n When you keep flirting with a few “cushions” (other prospects) just in case your current relationship implodes and you need someone to soften the fall—fast. Daterview \dat· r·vyü\ n A date that feels less butterfly inducing and more like you should have brought your résumé. You’re barraged with a line of questions about school, work, family, where you grew up, etc.…

The average American woman has her first kid at age 26, and 1 in 3 of those infants currently emerges not from the birth canal but from a lower abdominal incision. This procedure, called a cesarean, or C-section, is now the most common operation in the country. More than 1.2 million babies were born via the surgery in 2016 alone, according to the CDC. Maybe that’s why people tend to think of Cs as no big deal—despite the fact they are actually a major operation that requires a sharp knife through the belly, a slicing of the uterus, and some rearranging of organs. (Actor Dax Shepard memorably compared wife Kristen Bell’s C-section to getting “completely disassembled….Your liver’s out, I think. And… definitely your intestines.”) In plenty of cases, the operation…

Start with your full date of birth. Now get each element (month, day, and year) down to a single digit by adding the numbers together. Example for June 22, 1989: Month = 6 (Note: For months with double digits, like November, add the digits together, e.g., 1 + 1 = 2.) Day = 2 + 2 = 4 Year = 1 + 9 + 8 + 9 = 27; 2 + 7 = 9 Now add those three together… 6 + 4 + 9 = 19 (Get to a single digit!) 1 + 9 = 10; 1 + 0 = 1 Your number is 1. So What Does Your Number Say? ONE You are positive, determined, and ambitious. TWO You are imaginative and romantic and habitually take a backseat vs.…

MOSTLY A’S Perma Impassioned You pursue everything to the fullest… and with all the feels. That kind of dedication is rare, but like all good things, too much can overwhelm you (and those around you). Try to focus your extra mentality on just one or two things at a time, and make sure nothing turns into an unhealthy obsession. MOSTLY B’S Pretty Pumped You follow your passions but never go overboard. For the most part, that’s perfect, but don’t let your sense of self-awareness keep you from going full throttle every once in a while. A burst of intensity at just the right moment can awaken your inner badass and inspire others. MOSTLY C’S Always Unenthused Girl, you are all business. It’ll serve you well when shit hits the fan,…

I’m not easily overwhelmed. I live in New York City—one of the busiest metropolises in the world. The reason I love it here: I thrive on all the sights, sounds, and stimulation. But there’s one thing—a seemingly fun and frivolous activity, actually—that throws me for a loop: shopping for beauty products! I mean, there are just sooo many to choose from, and as a bona fide beauty junkie, I want them all. But since my bank account and apartment storage space won’t permit that, I’m forced to make decisions. Thank Goddess for Cosmo’s Beauty Awards, the ultimate guide to the greatest hair, body, and face beautifiers, which can be found on page 67. I’ve added a few of my own ride-or-die picks here—a gorgeous shadow palette from Hourglass; this refreshing…

Ross Butler If you haven’t already binge-watched Netflix’s 13 Reasons Why, catch up before the season two premiere. But first, meet fan fave Ross Butler. Ready for Love “For a long time, I made a conscious decision not to date. I think you need to take time to focus on yourself, especially in your early to mid-20s. I wanted to be emotionally set and get my career going before I got into anything serious. Now I think I have a good foundation, and somebody I bring into my life could teach me things and help me branch out.” Photographic Evidence “Of the 13 Reasons Why cast, I’m known as the eater and the sleeper—a great combo, in my opinion. The others like to take horrible pictures of me drooling on-set…

INEQUALITY SUCKS Ever heard of the Pink Tax? Even if you haven’t, we bet you’ve felt its effects. Truth is, it’s way more expensive to be a woman in today’s world than it is to be a man. How’s this for mind-blowing? On average, a woman pays $1,351 more per year on everyday goods and services than a man does. Just look inside your home: Women are charged more for things like basic white T-shirts and jeans 40 percent of the time, and female-branded deodorants and razors cost more 56 percent of the time! That little-known extra charge is called the Pink Tax. It affects every woman, and EWC is using its reach and influence to help women take a stand against it. CHANGE AGENTS EWC is on a mission…

Novelty Don’t want to wear your heart on your sleeve? Wear it on your face. Micro Lens Take a page out of the Hadid playbook and go teeny tiny. Oversize Hide a hangover and protect your peepers from harmful rays. Novelty Micro Lens Oversize…

Best Retinol “Retinol smooths texture and wrinkles long-term, but it can really screw with skin short-term. My pick helps eliminate the fallout by combining a time-released retinol with hydrating botanical extracts that boost your skin’s ability to retain moisture. Genius!” —LAUREN BALSAMO, SENIOR BEAUTY EDITOR Best Sunscreen “If you want an SPF that shields without suffocating, then this tube is for you. It’s lightweight and clear, and the texture allows for flawless makeup application. I look forward to putting it on every morning.” —L.B. Best Body Oil “My 2018 #SkinGoal: to treat my bod one-tenth as well as I do my face. Enter this luxe moisturizer. It has antioxidant green tea and rosemary oil to help boost circulation, and it never feels greasy.” —MARTA TOPRAN, BEAUTY DIRECTOR Best Bar Soap…

Best Candle “Into the green scene like me? You’ll love that this natural-scented candle lists every single ingredient (yay, transparency!). As for the scent, the frankincense and cypress notes scream sexy night in.” —MARTA TOPRAN, BEAUTY DIRECTOR Best Everyday Scent “Sweet and juicy, but not too sugary, this blend of blackberry and Bulgarian rose is perfect for 9-to-5 and 5-to-9.” —LEAH WYAR, CHIEF BEAUTY DIRECTOR Best Night-Out Fragrance “A dab of the orange and vanilla blend on my pulse points feels both sultry and rebellious, and the tiny-size rollerball fits in my clutch.” —KATE FOSTER, ASSOCIATE BEAUTY EDITOR Best Confidence Booster “The leather and vanilla mix is unique. And the name? Only Tom Ford could get away with it!” —ERIN STOVALL, BEAUTY ASSISTANT Best Travel Perfume “I’ve loved this light…

Cleanser Thanks to a mix of gentle clays and a probiotic complex, this wash removes oil and impurities without overstripping skin. Mist Spritz this on your face, feet, armpits… wherever! It contains ammonia-oxidizing bacteria, which convert sweat components into beneficial ingredients for the skin. Sheet Mask Exfoliating can temporarily make skin weaker. Strengthen it with this hydrating mask, rich in probiotic Bifidus extract. Essence Splash this on your face morning and night to protect skin from the harmful effects of pollution. It’s infused with kombucha, which helps prevent free-radical damage. Moisturizer Formulated with prebiotic water, this lotion hydrates and rebalances your microbiome to reduce dry, scaly skin.…

FRIDAY 20 percent of singles think it’s okay to Like a date’s post or photo before the first date. SOURCE: MATCH.COM’S 2018 SINGLES IN AMERICA SURVEY Showing your romantic interest without looking too thirsty is a hard balance to strike…especially on social media. After you’ve “researched” your new crush online and gone on a few dates, when do you add them on Snapchat? Is it cool to Like their Facebook status? How soon can you post an Instagram pic together? Don’t be fooled—these moves matter. “They’re baby steps for testing your partner’s interest in being public and showing affection with you,” says sociologist Lisa Wade, PhD, a professor at Occidental College and author of American Hookup: The New Culture of Sex on Campus. With that in mind, here are your (super)…

How can my partner and I make kissing feel exciting again? 1_ Have a “sex day” when all that’s on the menu is lots of nudity and kisses all over each other. “There’s this idea that if something’s planned, it can’t feel spontaneous, and that’s not true,” says clinical sexologist Dawn Michael, PhD. 2_ Next time your S.O. is making coffee in the morning, hug them from behind unexpectedly and start nibbling on their ear before turning their face toward yours. 3_ Take a detour to a secluded spot on your drive home. Run the tip of your tongue in a circle around their lips before pressing it into their mouth. The dude I just started seeing says he wants to finish on my face. How do I respond? 1_…

Thanks to a long overdue cultural reckoning, our society is now laser-focused on how women are treated in all aspects of life. Much has been said about sexual harassment in the workplace, but less discussed is what’s appropriate outside professional settings. This has left many people confused about the boundaries between seduction and harassment on a romantic level. When it comes to flirting, what’s considered an acceptable come-on, and what’s crossing a major line? The shortest, most basic answer is this: If you feel complimented, you are being seduced. If you feel degraded, you are being harassed. Of course, real life isn’t always so black-and-white, and there can be times—say, at a bar, party, or even online—when the distinction may not feel so clear. Perhaps you can’t fully decide whether…

1 Make Conversation With Other People It’s sexy for a man to see a woman be charming with others. Important: Do this mostly with other women or it might come off as flirting. 2 Suggest a “Date Interlude” Yes, you want him to have a plan. But you can also mention the taco place that he has to try. Guys like to lead, but it’s fun when you can help cocreate the date. It says that you are a good teammate. 3 Give Him an Early Compliment Dates can feel like a poker game with each player waiting to show their hand. Instead, give him a compliment ASAP, like how great his shirt looks, to foster an instant sense of comfort. 4 Defer the After-Hours Drink Finish on a high,…

You know stress. (Who doesn’t?) You also know it’ll probably pass, right after you meet that looming deadline. Except it doesn’t always fade, and you remain tense and clenched. Why? Maybe because you’re not actually stressed. Turns out, big, well-known emotions can disguise a host of more nuanced feels. Stuff like stress can be just the tip of an emotional iceberg. There’s often a whole lot more going on down below. For example, perhaps it wasn’t that deadline frazzling you. It was the fact that your boss always subtly undermines you. Research shows, acknowledging and addressing these buried feelings can lead to “better psychological health, career success, and meaning in life,” says psychologist Susan David, PhD, author of Emotional Agility. (People who don’t do so are at greater risk for…

“Eating more plant-based foods is good for your health and the environment,” says Mia Syn, RDN, a nutritionist in Charleston, South Carolina. It’s also hella trendy, thanks to the still-soaring popularity of veganism and a slew of inventive dairy-free offerings. Enter: new “yogurts” that are great for people who can’t deal with lactose (a sensitivity or intolerance can strike at any point in your life and can cause bloating and bellyaches). Plus, they’re just damn delicious. These four varieties taste convincingly close to the real thing. BASE Soy Organic soy milk makes for a smooth, protein-packed cup that’s then loaded up with fruit. Tasty flavors include blueberry and raspberry. Stonyfield Organic Dairy Free Yogurt in Blueberry, $1.20, supermarkets BASE Pili Nuts They grow in volcanic soil and deliver a soft,…

Talk to your doc. As soon as you know you’re pregnant, ask about his or her C-section rate and overall philosophy. If it doesn’t gel with yours, find a new physician. Research your local hospitals. Websites like LeapfrogGroup.org track C-section rates at various facilities, but you can also just call and request the information. Stay healthy. One 2017 study found that a healthy diet and moderate exercise during pregnancy lowered women’s odds of ending up with a cesarean. Bring a coach. If you’re worried you won’t be able to advocate for yourself, hire a doula (aka a birth coach), bring your mom or best pal, or prep your partner to speak up for you during labor.…

The travel trend has taken over Insta (more than 2.6 million posts!) and countless open roads—for good reason. Living out of a rolling home is a low-key, low-cost way to explore. Rent a van from companies like Campervan N.A. or Escape Campervans (from $57 a night) and get going. PACK IT UP Stuff your bag with lots of layers to adjust to fluctuating temps. DRIVE SAFE, POST RIGHT Take the most shareable pics (like this one from the book Van Life, by Foster Huntington) at dawn or dusk. Open your Amazon App Tap the camera icon Choose SmileCode Scan to shop!…

1. Glow to the Mediterranean with Chantecaille’s Italy-inspired Sirena bronzer ($72, chantecaille.com). 2 Starz’s adaptation of Stephanie Danler’s hit restaurant-biz novel, Sweetbitter, is as deliciously edgy as the original (May 6). 3 Between Taylor Swift’s Reputation Tour (kicking off May 8), Sam Hunt’s genre-blending Nashional Festival (April 20 and 21, in Nashville), and Khalid’s Roxy Tour (starting May 1), there’s a killer spring show for every music lover out there. 4. Let Beach Bunny and Chanel Iman‘s sexy swimwear inspire a next-level Memorial Day vacay (top, $130; bottom, $120, beachbunny swimwear.com). 5. How’s this for aspirational? Amy Schumer’s self-deprecating Renee bumps her head and starts thinking she’s a freakin’ supermodel in the hilarious yet thoughtful film I Feel Pretty (April 20). 6 Bar cart not quite stocked? No worries. The…

For the last 12 years, I’ve had a once-in-a-lifetime job as president of Planned Parenthood. Founded before women had the right to vote and before birth control was legal, this 101-year-old organization has a proud tradition of audacious troublemakers. Always on the front lines of the fight for reproductive rights, Planned Parenthood was built by women who broke taboos and laws to stand up for what they believed. As I leave my post to the next leader, I’ve been reflecting on what it means to break the rules… or better yet, write your own. My first brush with the authorities, so to speak, was in seventh grade in Texas, when I wore a black armband to school to protest the Vietnam War. The principal called my mom, Ann Richards, to…

Confessions “I was at the biggest basketball game of the year—everyone was there! I had to be the cutest girl at the game, so I put on the highest pair of heels I could find. Everything was going perfectly until I had to walk down the bleachers to go to the concessions. I got to the last set of stairs before tripping on my own heel. I tumbled all the way down on the court. That was three years ago, and I still have not lived that down.” —JASMINE J., 23, TEACHER, JACKSONVILLE, FL “Once, a piece of my hair extensions fell out and went missing. I looked everywhere I could think of but couldn’t find it! After two days, I finally found it—my cat had eaten it, and it…

Anchor your look with navy, then add a pop of red. No matter your port of call, stripes and glowing skin slay. Create a white-hot vibe with chic extras. Open your Amazon App Tap the camera icon Choose SmileCode Scan to shop!…

Open your Amazon App Tap the camera icon Choose SmileCode Scan to shop!…

Best Blow-Dryer “Yes, it sped up my drying time. Yes, the ‘volume booster’ injected fullness. But the insanely cool feature that makes it worth every penny? When you put it down, it shuts off, then turns right back on when you pick it up again!” —PAIGE STABLES, BEAUTY ASSISTANT Best New Makeup Brand “Rihanna’s made-for-Insta foundations have been one of the biggest stories in beauty this year. The formula gave me medium coverage (can build to full) but still looked like skin. And I was able to find my perfect color match with its extensive range of 40 shades…a coup, as I’m fair-skinned with yellow undertones.” —ERIN STOVALL, BEAUTY ASSISTANT Best Facial-Hair Remover “Ten years ago, I laughed when a friend told me she spied a few dark chin hairs.…

Best Cleansing Stick There’s no better way to purify your pores on the fly. Best Makeup Applicator Silicone sponges are easy to use (and less germy than your fingers). Best Bright Liner Denim eyes aren’t going anywhere—consider this hue a universal wash. Best Toner Calm irritated skin with this soothing aloe-laced spray. Best Detangler Knot today, tangles. Just spritz this on wet hair, comb, and go. Best Deodorant Keep this mini stashed in your bag for when your sweat glands have no chill. Best Quickie Hair Mask Five minutes with this will give you the healthy mermaid hair you desire. Best Bold Color A shade this cool is guaranteed to make your lips look succulent. Best Powder Highlighter The super-smooth formula gives you major glow with zero caking. Best Nail…

1 It’s an easy update. Unlike longer styles that are prone to flippy, outdated-looking ends, a cut that clears your shoulders prevents tips from awkwardly jutting out, says celeb hairstylist Kristin Ess. (Search her Insta @Kristin_Ess and the hashtag #ClearTheShoulders for epic haircut inspo). 2 It flatters all. We’re talking every face shape. “I think that’s why these cuts are staying around for so long this time,” says Ess. It can even accentuate certain features, she adds. For example, a midneck bob will help elongate a rounder face, while a shorter cut with bangs can balance a more narrow one. 3 It’s simple to maintain. No time for a trim? No prob! If you keep the initial cut chin length or longer, the shape will grow out nicely into a…

Take this picta-quiz. Ready, Jet, Go! It’s Memorial Day weekend. Where are you kicking off your summer? Float On Quick! Call dibs on a pool pal. Mane Attraction Double-tap the most Insta-worthy hairstyle. Eye Candy Pick a shadow to complete your GNO look. Sole Mate You feel like a street-style star in… Nail It by Channeling One of These Looks by Miss Pop! Mostly A’s You need a style that’s as bright as your personality. Don’t be afraid to get artsy with vivid colors, all the glitter, and a sassy pout print. Mostly B’s While others do the most, you’re happy keeping it classic. A clean, graphic design will complement your minimalist #Aesthetic. Mostly C’s Go ahead and flaunt your inner girly girl. You’ll get the most picture-perfect nailfie with…

After a tough breakup with her longtime boyfriend, Natalie*, 25, joined Tinder. She spent about a month swiping through men until one day, she decided to peek at women. “At first, I did it to get ideas for my profile,” she says. “But soon, I was like, wait, she’s cute. I wonder if….” Lately, more and more previously straight-identifying millennial women seem to be expanding their gender preferences on dating apps—broadening their swiping and settings beyond just “interested in men.” (Many are even going all the way by specifically identifying as LGBT+. OkCupid, for one, has seen a 65 percent spike of such female users in the past year.) Some women do it strictly to size up their female competition or, like Natalie, to crib ideas for their own bios.…

It’s kind of like yoga (think: deep breathing, staying centered) but way more NSFW. “The only goals are to go slow, be present, and discover new paths to pleasure,” says sex expert Emily Morse, host of the Sex With Emily podcast. And because it’s not necessarily about climaxing, it can help couples deepen their bond. Try it by: 1 Pre-intercourse, syncing up your breathing with your partner’s. Working on this together is surprisingly intimate. 2 Locking eyes. The longer you hold your stares, the more vulnerable you’ll feel, which can lead to more playful and uninhibited sex. 3 Grinding half as fast as you normally do, so that you feel each other’s every move.…

1 If you’re flirtatious with someone and they seem uneasy, do you try a different tactic? YES NO 2 Do you send dating-app matches multiple messages, even if they haven’t yet responded? YES NO 3 In your opinion, is taking a slow approach an outdated way to get together with someone? YES NO If you answered mostly yes, you may be making moves that leave others feeling uncomfortable. Next time, pay closer attention. If someone declines your advances, take a hint and bow out. If you answered mostly no, then you are respecting other people’s boundaries. Continue to flirt with romantic prospects in ways that pique both your interests.…

I went on a few dates with a really sweet guy, but I’m just not feeling him. Is it okay to let him down via text? A_ Just so you know, after a few months, most men prefer a face-to-face breakup. But after a few dates, a text is fine. To say buh-bye, be kind, clear, and brief: “You’re a nice guy, but I just don’t think we’re the best match. Take care.” And no, this is not the time to add an emoji or GIF to lighten the blow. A won’t make him feel better about being dumped, and it may even lead him to think that you never took him seriously in the first place. Are dudes constantly afraid of getting a boner at random times? And how…

Too tough at first? Try hinging with your arms at your sides. Either way, keep your body in a straight line from head to knees the entire time. SNAP NOW, SWEAT LATER! Take a pic of this move to bring to the gym. Hinges Tone your thighs and tighten your core with this looks-so-easy, burns-so-hard move from Insta star KELSEY WELLS (@KelseyWells), creator of the total-body PWR program on the Sweat app. Kneel with your knees directly below your hips, and put your arms straight out in front of you. Drive your shoulder blades down and back. Hinging from your knees, slowly lean back until your shoulders are directly above your heels. As you lean, open your arms wide, keeping them at shoulder height. Pause, then bring your arms back…

Ever searched for #Fitspo on your socials, hoping to score a hit of workout motivation…only to find yourself sucked into a black hole of before-and-after posts? Same. Although it seems like they’re suddenly everywhere, transformation photos aren’t exactly new—brands were using them to sell diets and workouts decades before “fitfluencer” became a legit career. Lately, however, modern versions have become ubiquitous on social media, as fitness stars blast them out to their millions of followers. And experts have begun to investigate how this fitspiration impacts viewers—with some troubling results. While before-and-after pics might inspire sweat sessions, they can also spur mental-health issues, according to a recent Journal of Health Psychology study. “When you’re exposed to images of women who transformed their bodies, you might evaluate those bodies against yours,” says…

Look, it happens to the best of us: the late-night birthday party that ends a little too close to early-morning coffee with your boss, the last-minute project that keeps you at work well into dinner plans with your squad. Sometimes (all the times?), it feels impossible to achieve that much-hyped but ever-elusive goal: work-life balance. That’s because it is. Giving a hundred percent on and off the job every day just isn’t realistic or even feasible. Yet women in particular are sold the idea that they need to find this professional-personal nirvana, says Shawn Burn, PhD, a psychology professor at California Polytechnic State University at San Luis Obispo. “These too-high standards mean you’ll be doing a lot of ‘shoulding.’” As in: I should perform perfectly at work. I should be…

Eggplant Tacos With Pico de Gallo 2 lbs. eggplant, cut lengthwise into ¼-inchthick slices¼ c. extra-virgin olive oil Kosher salt and freshly ground pepper2 t. ground coriander1 t. ground cumin8 corn tortillas Pico de gallo, to top8 lime wedges, to garnish Preheat a grill or grill pan to medium-high heat. Brush both sides of eggplant with olive oil, and season both sides with salt, pepper, coriander, and cumin. Grill eggplant about 4 minutes per side, until tender. When cool enough to handle, slice crosswise into strips. Grill tortillas until warm, no more than 1 minute. Spoon eggplant and pico de gallo onto tortillas. Garnish with lime, and serve. Adapted from Great Tastes, by Danielle & Laura Kosann, $20, amazon.com Open your Amazon App Tap the camera icon Choose SmileCode Scan…

Peekaboo Chic Edgy mesh keeps you cool, day or night. Stripe Tease Sporty meets sexy in pieces that look great on (or off!) a board. Sunny Days Millennial pink is out; not-so-mellow yellow is most definitely in. Print Perfect Printed tops—like this wearable postcard sweater—are on point this season. Game, Set, Match Consider this your new three-piece suit for all your poolside meetings. Sweet Flow We love the beachcomber vibes of this seashell-print set—wear them together or apart. Flower Power Want to be your own bouquet? Opt for bold blooms. Shining Bright Flirty ruffles + a metallic sheen = date-ready style. Hair: Nicolas Eldin for Philip Kingsley at Art Department. Makeup: Christian McCulloch for Dior Beauty. Model: Malaika Firth/Marilyn. Accommodations and location: Sugar Beach, a Viceroy Resort, viceroyhotelsandresorts.com/sugarbeach. See page…

HE’S MOVING FAST. “Real love takes time,” says counselor Anne Brown. If a relationship is going at breakneck speed—and he tells you on the second or third date that you’re soul mates—pause and reconsider. HE’S SO DAMN CHARMING. Psychopaths are expert manipulators, and charm covers their tracks. “Often, they use it to hide something they don’t want you to know,” says psychologist Jill Ricke, PhD. HE NEVER ACCEPTS RESPONSIBILITY. While lots of people have bad breakups, “one red flag is when he can’t see his part in things that didn’t work,” says Brown. If he’s always bad-mouthing his exes, be cautious. HE HAS NO REAL FRIENDS. “Psychopaths tend not to keep people around for long,” says Brown. Ask yourself: Have I met any close, long-term pals?…

COVER Alice + Olivia by Stacey Bendet, aliceandolivia.com. Giuseppe Zanotti, giuseppezanotti.com. Odette New York, odetteny.com. Lancôme, lancome-usa.com. GET INTO IT PAGE 7: Zimmermann, us.zimmermann.com. RIDING HIGH PAGES 162 TO 163: Alice McCall, modaoperandi.com. Golden Goose Deluxe Brand, goldengoosedeluxebrand.com. Stetson, stetson.com. Monica Vinader, monicavinader.com/us. PAGE 164: Bardot for 100% Bloomingdale’s, bloomingdales.com. Hudson, hudsonjeans.com. Christian Louboutin, Christian Louboutin New York, Boston, Las Vegas. Monica Vinader, monicavinader.com/us. PAGE 167: Vivetta, farfetch.com. Monica Vinader, monicavinader.com/us. Chloé, sephora.com. TAKE YOUR STYLE ON VACAY PAGE 168: Altuzarra, Barney’s, Neiman Marcus. Paul Andrew, shopbop.com. Tomas Maier, tomasmaier.com. PAGE 169: 3.1 Phillip Lim, 31philliplim.com. PAGE 170: Prabal Gurung, shopbop.com. Christian Louboutin, christianlouboutin.com. Tomas Maier, tomasmaier.com. PAGE 171: Paul & Joe, paulandjoe.com. PAGE 172: Emilio Pucci, Emilio Pucci Boutiques. Tomas Maier, tomasmaier.com. PAGE 173: BreeLayne, breelayne.com. PAGE 174: Zimmermann,…

1.Oh, hey there, Monday morning. As you lift your head off the pillow, you’re: A Already posting positive intentions on your Insta Story! B Beelining to the sacred altar that is your coffee machine. No seizing the day till caffeination has commenced. C Smashing the snooze button. 2. Your latest hobby is pottery making. By your second class, you: A Quit your day job and move to artsy Woodstock to open a ceramics studio. B Try selling your shiz on Etsy as a side hustle. C Return all your supplies to the art store. Wet clay, not so chic. 3. You’re at a super-posh restaurant and feelin’ your date. You show it by: A Initiating a next-level smoochfest that toes the line of public lewdness. B Keeping the PDA covert—a…